So this is the new year...

And I apologize for the DCFC reference so early in the post. It is 9 am, I'm working on my first cup of coffee, and reviewing the year that just passed. I traveled a lot, I got a new job, I started working on a few major projects, I left a critique group, joined a committee, and built a garage.

So, The Year In Review - in case you missed it (and this is very vague - I'm doing this from memory):

January: Started the year in Omaha with a severe case of the flu. Started this blog. Took a class on Modernism. Froze my butt off while waiting for the great blizzard winter to end. Sat on a panel about Art and Music. Had a show at the Symphony.

February: Hm...I'm sure I did something. Oh, I made a book out of iron. That was pretty cool. Otherwise it was one of those busy prep-months for March.

March: Miami! Miami was awesome, stayed for 4 days for the SPE conference. Built a bunch of tiny houses. Worked in sculpture more consistently than I had before - more on this later.

April: I got older, as I do every year at this time. This one kinda hit me though, 31 felt just *so* much older than 30. I also did my first public art installation, got a write-up in the paper about it, and officially became a member of the SPE National Conference 2008 Local Planning Committee.

May: Gosh....May was a bunch of downtime, I think. Good though. Downtime can be very therapeutic. Oh, wait....I had a show at Vertigo. Had to get that printed and framed. I think I also had a show in Fort Collins in May....I seem to remember these two shows being back to back.

June: I saw a lot of local art in June. I finally made it out to the first Friday events, and headed over to RMCAD for the solo show by Viviene LeCourtois, and made headway on the gallery list for the SPE conference, as well as coming up with the Month of Photography plan with Mark Sink and Sabin Aell.

July: Started up the MOP blog (303photo.blogspot.com)...Quit the critique group I'd been in for so long, and also helped host a baby shower for a friend. Built a 2 car garage in my backyard too.

August: Shot a wedding, had a busy and stressful month at work, so not much else got done.

September: Applied for a new job. Kept being stressed.

October: Went to Europe! Shot a wedding in Scotland, saw a Tacita Dean exhibition in London, went to the Louvre and saw some wonderful art, spent ***hours*** in the Centre Pompidou looking at modern art, went to the Palais de Tokyo, and tried (unsuccessfully) to convince my husband and sister that 25 euros was TOTALLY worth paying to go to FIAC! which was in town at the same time. Alas, no luck. But we had a great time and will go back. We also saw work at the National Gallery in London, and had an all around lovely time. Meanwhile, I was showing work in Minnesota as well.

November: Started my new job!

December: Sat on a panel at PlatteForum (more of a public critique than panel, but there were a bunch of us, taking turns talking, so there you go). Submitted my thesis proposal (of which I am QUITE proud), coordinated some photo shoots for my job (I'm basically the creative for this major recruiting project involving billboards. I am loving this) and then at the end of the year, flew to New York City just as a snow storm was cancelling flights out of Denver. I was never so happy to be in a first class seat - especially because when I got to New York, I got up the next day, helped a friend re-pack her 12' moving truck, and we turned around and drove *back* to Denver. This is a trip I did in reverse 2 years ago, same time frame, but this time it was much harder. We got a late start in New York, didn't get any farther than Pittsburgh the first night, and then stayed in a really disgusting hotel room. The second night we rewarded our push to Columbia, MO with a GORGEOUS brand new room at the Residence Inn - I am swwearing off any other hotel chains other than Marriott from now on - and then tried to make it home on Sunday - unfortunately, a ground blizzard in Kansas closed the road locally, and we had to stop in Colby for the night. I made it back to Denver for a quiet New Year's Eve at home with my husband, and was in bed by 10 pm.

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But! It's now a new year. My goals:

1. Apply for 3 residencies (PlatteForum is one, the other two to be determined)
2. Consider restructuring my work schedule for a new photo based project I am thinking about...this will require a week day off, so we will see... not impossible
3. Send out responses to calls for entry at least 2x a month - with at least 1 each month being non-local, and 3 for the year being international
4. Get my FCP certification completed.
5. Start working with Katie Taft on our super cool project
6. Oh, and I'll probably try to work out and be healthy or something like that blah blah blah.

I have never been a real resolutions oriented person. I don't feel like I need a special day to start doing something, when I want to get things done. This is more like a business goal, for most of these, so it's just sensible to frame them in the year cycle.

I did start thinking about something while on my trip back to Denver with my friend. When I was an undergrad, I took photo and sculpture classes. I loved photo history, I loved art history, and I loved all the classes, but had to select a specific track to be on - which ended up being photography. In looking at where my work has gone now, there is still a photographic element to it all, but there is also a strong sculptural component...and I notice that a lot of multi-disciplinary art jobs out there end up in the 'sculpture' departments....despite the fact that I don't know much about lost wax casting (i've done it, have no idea how to order shell or specific melting temperatures for the various metals, etc etc) and couldn't safely calculate load weight or anything like that...but I like sculpture. I have decided that my 'real' title is less photographer or artist using photography, but just an artist. I have a hard time classifying myself, and I don't do specific things like paint and make collages, or make photographs of specific things. All my work has been interactive, so this is what my real goal should be for the year - make work with the interactive, interdisciplinary framework in mind, rather than 'how is this photography' as the repeating question.

I wonder how that will change my work?

PlatteForum

I'm on my way out to visit friends and brave the *very deep snow* we've got here in Denver today, but here's a little something to share: a video clip from This Week In Denver featuring information about Platte Forum and the current artist in residence (and friend, and artist and arts community builder extraordinaire) Katie Taft.

Click here for the story and video....you'll probably want to pause the video until you've got a decent amount loaded in the buffer before watching.

Great Job Katie!!

Done! Completed!

I had to finish a major bit of work, a packet for submission to my thesis committee, and it is due the 1st of January. I finished it all tonight, so I am now ready to have fun!!

Too bad the traditional Sunday night TV is being replaced by Spiderman, who is not my cup of tea.

Anyway, in the meantime, I wanted to share with you my newest installation. It hasn't been exhibited anywhere yet, so any feedback is welcome, which may make the work better. One of the things I realized about my work as I move away from straight photography (which is not a surprise - I wrote about land art and happenings most of the time in undergrad, and my biggest influences were Andy Goldsworthy, Richard Long, Allan Kaprow, and Marina Abrimovich) I am really focusing on the action and intereaction aspects of the work. My older projects (Archaeometry, Tiny Houses) had an element of action documentation in them, but as my work has developed, I am expecting people to intereact withthe work, and almost requiring it for the work to be completed.

It brings about the question of the role of the viewer in art, and whether work exists despite the viewer or only because of the viewer - or even in this case, an active and willing participant.

The piece that I am posting here is tentatively titled Sketchbook, and is a variable dimension installation with a table, plastic cup with Uni-ball micro pens (black ink) [the only pen I will use] and a stack of 8 1/2"x 11" paper. On the paper is a a word or phrase from my sketchbooks (which go back several years and encompass my research, my sketches, my project information, and sometimes just random notes). The paper is stacked up, and people (viewers) are invited to participate in the piece by reacting/responding to the words/phrases on the paper. I feel like I can continue to add to the work but at each exhibition I will exhibit the same pages including the responses that have already been recorded by other viewers. I'd be happy to hear any responses you may have, or suggestions of artists to look at, changes to make, etc.

In the meantime, for those of you doing Christmas, here's wishing you the best, and for everyone, a very happy new year full of wonderful things!

Wow.

Life has been SO BUSY.

It's good though, I love it.

I'm working on a billboard project, and some web stuff. In the evenings, I've been working on my thesis, and the Month of Photography, SPE conference, and oh, trying to keep my house clean, dinner made, celebrating Hanukkah, reading books, etc etc etc.

Crazy, y'all. Just plain crazy.

But it's good. I'll be going to New York City next week for a mini-break to hang out with a friend (and help her move back to Denver) which means dinner at Beast for sure...always a good time.

In the mean time:

Platteforum just wrapped their most recent artist residency with Katie Taft - check out the resulting work until January 2nd.

if you're in NYC - Francesca Woodman's work is on display at Marian Goodman gallery - go see!!

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My thesis work is moving forward smoothly....what's left to see is whether it's approved by my committee for exhibition. I don't feel like talking about it much here, but I'm really happy with some of the work I've been doing, and I have a few other steps I am ready to make....this weekend will be a big work weekend getting things ready to submit to the committee. I'll probably post images *after* I get things together and sent in the mail (they want it all by the 1st of January) and have some time to feel like I can live in the work, you know?

I've also been tasked by my (very awesome) boss to find an award that I can compete for...I'm not sure how things like Center might fit into this charge, because while I am working on small projects, I don't think any of my current work is yet 'project-ready' - but maybe soon. I do have a goal of doing a ride-along at last once a month, not just with officers in our local districts (Golden, Adams County, Castle Rock, etc - all within an hour of our office) but also with officers with completely different daily tasks - the immigration task force, Summit County, or even (especially) the Western Slope - get a sense of what images represent their day to day work, and how they are dealing with working in the field.

It's an amazing job, I really feel so very busy all the time, but in a good way...like I can keep going because I just have so much to do, but also it's not stuff that breaks my heart (oh, gee, another stack of paper to file????) and makes me want to run away.....

So. Yeah.

With that, I need to break this short, because it is 10:20 and I need to be at work in 10 hours, and tomorrow is the shortest day of the year - something that always feels important and special to me. I want to see the sun rise, then set, because once it does that, I know we're in for 6 months of progressively longer, brighter and warmer days. With this 'year' closing out so beautifully, it can only get more positive from here on out.

Peace to you!

Catch a falling star....

When I pulled into my driveway Monday night after work, I happened to glance up and see a HUGE fiery ball rocketing through the sky just above my house. Meteor? Falling star? Aliens?? I have no idea, but it would have been really cool to have a camera in my pocket at the time (and a tripod, and nothing in my hands) because it was really beautiful, and lasted long enough to actually comprehend what I was seeing. I didn't make a wish, only took it as a sign of good things are coming, and beauty is all around, as it's been a crazy crazy month.

I finished my deadline project for the SPE conference brochure. If you don't know what SPE is, you should check it out. It's a great organization centered around photography with a conference that occurs once a year in March, and then has regional smaller conferences in the fall. What I like about it is that there is less 'gear' talk (though that does exist) and more practice talk. Artistic practice is huge there. At last year's conference, I was sitting with some friends around a table on the lower floor of the Radisson Miami. We all had our portfolios out on the table and were talking about the big things - ideas, visions, etc etc. We took turns flipping through our work and people stopped to look over shoulders, talking about this or that image. Younger (and not by age, I mean in terms of education and years of practice) photo students would come by and the "how" questions would emerge, but we all made a point of sharing the why as the primary answer to the photographs on display. It was this moment, sitting there, sharing, that made me feel *so* connected to the other artists in the field, especially because over the past few years, I've been feeling rather...afraid might be the word... about my work. It has been a rough go...I've been crazy busy (I know, excuses) and my health hasn't been 100% physically or mentally, but I'm on an upswing, I can feel it. Things are going to start to work again.

Part of this has to do with a change in environment. For two years after graduation, while attending grad school, I worked a front desk position in a Student Activities office at a small college, with a very liberal boss who allowed me to do web stuff, photoshop stuff, and all sorts of my own miscellaneous work while at work, since our workload was slight. Then I switched positions, and the atmosphere wasn't as fun and lighthearted, nor was it as free as the previous position. I still had moments of free time at the new job, but my allowed at work activities were limited to actual work type things. I know this is a standard practice for many, and I tried to adapt by doing things like taking my laptop with me to work at lunch on my own projects, or blogging in a word document. This was all fine, but the general atmosphere was NOT conducive to being productive. I thought I was able to stick it out, but in the last few months, it got incredibly toxic. It wasn't the workload, or the restrictions, or the hours even: it was the people (and I really do have a point here.)

So. When the perfect job description came along, I applied for it, and I got the job.

I started this week. Heading into it, I was concerned about how I would feel doing 'creative' work all day long, and then come home and spend 3 hours in the studio as well. So far, it hasn't been a problem. In fact, my brain feels like it's waking up from a fog. I came home on Tuesday and said to my husband "So, today at work, I went to a place. I took pictures of things. I then went back to my office, and I downloaded the pictures. I edited them for best shots, tweaked exposures, and resized copies. I burned and labeled CDs to send to people. I uploaded pictures to the internet. And they PAID me to do this!!"

I love it. The new job is perfect. I am a photographer for the State Patrol, and my position is at the Patrol Academy, so I am around troopers and cadets all day long. I have a pretty office with good lighting. I have 2 20" flat panel monitors to do my work. I have purchasing power to say "I need Adobe Lightroom, it's a much better photo editing workflow for this type of work." and then I will get Lightroom (ordering it tomorrow!). Yesterday I got to ride around with a trooper and photograph while he assisted motorists in the snow. I have a Nikon D200 that is mine. A photo studio that I can reorganize and design to be MY space. I have two rooms that I get to reorganize and redesign and my boss says "it is your space, we will do whatever you say we should do with it."

This is the first time I have ben hired for a job where they actually wanted me, my skills, my experience, and what I specifically could bring to the table, as opposed to just the presence of a living body that could function within the parameters of the position. They want me here. *ME* - and that makes the world of difference in how I feel about going to work. When my days are spent just following rote instructions, I have to cope with not being able to think my way through every problem, and I get bored. Sure, at first I would try to offer solutions, but every one was met with a roadblock. Now, I am told "Yes, your ideas are great! Let's do that!"

So, the moral of the story is this: I type very long winded posts, but if you are in a job where you are getting the life sucked out of you, and you can't enjoy coming home and doing your work, do what you can to make a change. It doesn't necessarily have to be a change to a career path, just something where the atmosphere is better. Toxic work environments will kill your creativity faster than any limited budget or schedule.

More to come...I owe you all a continuation on the Sophie Calle/Christian Boltanski post, and I also want to dedicate a post to some very fabulous photography/art events that have happened.

photo © NASA

Waiting is the hardest part...

And I feel like the last couple years have been spent with a lot of waiting on my part. I keep busy, sure, but there have been various things in the wings that have subjected me to the schedules and opinions of others.

Now, I am on my own schedule (yet one that's a widely accepted social practice) of having to work the two weeks after giving my notice at a job in order to start a new one. The waiting finally got me this weekend - instead of waiting to find out if I made the next round, waiting to find out if I am qualified, or waiting to just find out, I just dropped it all this weekend. I waited for nothing. I did nothing. I thought nothing. I barely read, wrote, photographed or blogged. I did a lot of staring at the computer - perhaps it's something I needed to do, because I've been running like crazy for so long...with the SPE gallery list getting wrapped for publication, hanging a show last week (p.s. I'm in a show at the Denver City and County Building), traveling (never as restful as you'd expect) and getting ready to visit family again this weekend (another rushed and harried weekend trip) - perhaps the complete lack of intelligence for my weekend was a result of being SO. TIRED.

But the meat of this matter is this: I start a new job on the 19th. And that job, for once, and for all, is related to my education, finally. It's not an academic position, but government. I'll be working as a photographer officially, instead of punching my card day in and day out as an admin. This is huge for me.

What it means in the terms of my work, however, I don't know what to say yet. Will working with all of my brain all day mean I am going to be exhausted at the end of the day? Will it inspire more work after the door closes behind me at 5 pm? How does working at what you love affect the work you love to do that will (unfortunately) not be classed as work in the eyes of the general public? I am in the situation where a daily 8 hours of work is required, and I can't go to my studio when inspiration strikes. It has long been a source of frustration to me, though I've assuaged those emotions by taking jobs that were "just for the money" and thinking I'd get through - though getting through is more and more of an effort when you realize how much of your brain you're NOT using. It's frustrating.

So now, I am going to be doing photography, video, production, editing, layouts for web and print....and more. What will this be for my work? I don't know. It actually is increasing my monthly available funds too, so I don't know HOW this will all play out. But the main thing is....I am doing work that will challenge me, and push my skills to the limit.....and here's the fun part: I get paid to use a Nikon D200 and my new desk has 2 20" flat panel monitors. Wheee!!!!

10 goals - Updated

1. Hang the show tomorrow
2. Continue the blog post about Sophie Calle, Tacita Dean, Christian Boltanski and Paul Celan
3. Send images to be made into slides (I shoot my documentation digitally and have slides made through www.iprintfromhome.com - I've been VERY satisfied with their work.)
4. file all the receipts from the Europe trip
5. Finish reading my book (Jews, God and History - Max Dimont)
6. Finish 'sketchbook project'
7. Document 'sketchbook project'
8. Submit 'sketchbook project' to 'works on paper' show at Core
9. Meet with Tom on Friday about show on architecture and space for March
10. Apply to Macdowell colony residency

10 goals.

I want them all done in 10 days.

I think that's fair.

Sur la douleur et la mort

As far as morbid blog post titles go, that might be up there. However, I'm not speaking of pain and death in experience, but in art.

In Paris, we had the chance to go to Centre Pompidou, and it was one of my favorite days in the city. I could have spent quite a lot longer in the building, but we didn't get there until after 2, and the combination of crowds, contemporary art, and hunger tend to wear out my sister and husband, so we only lasted for about 4 hours - which is still quite a good run. Fortunately, in that time I did get to see the installation of Sophie Calle's Douleur exquise (Exquisite Pain). In another room, I saw Christian Boltanki's installation that investigated his own past and history in vitrines on the wall.

These two artists are in my top ten of people who I look at obsessively, and who continue to influence my work. (Others on list: Tacita Dean, James Turrell, the writings of W. G. Sebald and Paul Celan, Francesca Woodman, Shimon Attie, Rachel Whiteread, and David Leventhal) With Calle, I am completely entranced by the way she throws herself into the work she makes. She becomes her project, and the project likewise is her mirror.

The Douleur Exquise project is one of my favorites by far in the diaristic nature of the work, and one that translates beautifully into book form. The book that I bought is a small grey hardcover with cloth binding, and shimmering red page edges and accents. Inside, the french text sets off the images that countdown the moment to Sophie's exquisite pain, the breakup with her boyfriend that is the source of this entire project - and then the countdown from the day of that pain to the final and complete end of the project.

In the museum, the piece is displayed as 2 photographs and two embroidered text panels, and they had a grouping of three of these sets. I knew which project it was immediately upon reading the lines "Il y a douze jours, l'homme j'aime m'a quittée" and then sat for a moment with the work. As a piece on the wall, it is interesting to look at for the contrast of the images with the text, and the idea of embroidering each of those words that describe the searing anguish of a breakup, and then the pain and suffering of others as they relate their experiences to Calle upon her return to Paris.

In book form, it is an even more intimate journey. Turning each page, reading each piece of text with the contrasting stamped image as document of the trip to New Delhi and back, with the photograph of the telephone on the bed as the center image in the book, one feels the advance toward the fateful note...yet is powerless to stop the advance of time. Like a wave receding from the shore as well, the return journey is muted...Calle's phone photograph on the left page with her text, a companion piece on the facing page with text, printed on matte surface pages rather than the gloss that preceded the message she received.

You forget you forget
the words turned flint in the fist

flashes of punctuation
crystallize
at your wrist,

out of the earth's
cracked crests,
pauses come charging

there, at
the sacrificial bush
where memory flares up,
you two are taken
in One breath.
-Paul Celan



For me, both Calle and Celan have something in their work that seems to be difficult to acheive: a raw, bloody edge that isn't embarrassing or over emotional. In the case of Sophie Calle, it's the meticulous approach that she uses, analyzing and cataloging every single object, token, word as source material... life as archive. Celan uses such evocative words and textures that it reduces the tension of the emotion and brings you back into the space of language, then back again into emotion, and again into language... like a pool of water just over your head, as exhaustion sets in, you continue to bob up for fresh air and yet you find yourself slowly slipping under the water... into the comfort of drowning and darkness.

to be continued......

The Macdowell Colony

THE MACDOWELL COLONY ANNOUNCES NEW FUNDING FOR ARTISTS

The MacDowell Colony, the leading artist residency program in the United States, is pleased to announce the establishment of a new fund for artists. Thanks to a generous grant by The Leon Levy Foundation, artists accepted for a MacDowell Fellowship who need additional financial assistance are now eligible for such aid. These grants can be used to cover expenses that continue to accrue while artists are away from home, including rent, utilities, and childcare. Artists may also use the grants to compensate for lost income or in the event an employer requires an unpaid leave to attend the Colony. Equipment and supplies may be addressed by this aid, as well.

The MacDowell Colony, which was founded in 1907, provides Fellowships to more than 250 artists each year across seven contemporary disciplines: visual arts, interdisciplinary art, architecture, film, theatre, literature, and music composition. Set on 450 acres of beautiful woods in rural New Hampshire, MacDowell’s reputation for offering the ideal environment for creative pursuits is well-established and highly regarded. Past Fellows include such luminaries as Milton Avery, James Baldwin, Leonard Bernstein, Willa Cather, Aaron Copland, Thornton Wilder, and more recently Jonathan Franzen, Bright Sheng, Oscar Hijuelos, Eve Sussman, Qin Feng, and Stewart Wallace, among many others.

Offering 32 private studios designed for the specific discipline of the artist, the Colony also provides meals and separate accommodations. Artists who are accepted to MacDowell through its highly competitive application process are allowed up to eight weeks of undisturbed time and space to pursue their work. The criterion is talent as demonstrated in a work sample that is reviewed by selection panels in each discipline. Application deadlines for the three annual residency periods are January 15th, April 15th, and September 15th.

The Leon Levy Grants are part of an overall effort by MacDowell to ensure artists face no barriers in finding the time and space necessary to create. This program expands on a similar successful program for writers established in 1997. In addition, through The MacArthur Foundation and the David and Rosamond Putnam Foundation, MacDowell reimburses the transportation costs for international and domestic artists for travel to and from the Colony. Permanent funding for the financial assistance programs is being sought.

“While MacDowell Fellowships are awarded based on exceptional talent, we believe that as many as half of the artists who come to the Colony each year struggle financially,” says Cheryl Young, MacDowell’s executive director. “A review of financial information indicates that the average income for aid applicants in literature in 2006 was 22,000 dollars, with 48 percent of these households falling below the poverty line. It’s wonderful that The Leon Levy Foundation is making it possible to expand this program to Colony artists of all artistic disciplines.”

The Leon Levy Foundation is a private, not-for-profit foundation created from the estate of Leon Levy, a legendary investor with a longstanding commitment to philanthropy and humanism.

Celebrating its Centennial this year, The MacDowell Colony was awarded the National Medal of Arts in 1997 for “for nurturing and inspiring many of this century’s finest artists.” It is the only artist residency program to have received this prominent honor. MacDowell has served as the model for residency programs throughout the United States and internationally. Since its founding 100 years ago, such communities have become the nation’s largest source of support for individual artists. For more information about the Colony or to apply, please visit our Web site at http://www.macdowellcolony.org


courtesy of eflux