beautiful photographs- by rachel hawthorn

Archaeometry

2011-04-16T11:50:00.002-06:00

Laundry Day

2011-03-28T06:00:00.001-06:00

Creek

2011-03-27T06:00:00.000-06:00

Current

2011-03-25T06:00:00.000-06:00

Lights

2011-03-24T06:00:00.000-06:00

Radiator

2011-03-23T06:00:00.000-06:00

Rain

2011-03-22T06:00:00.001-06:00

Rain | 2010 Rachel Hawthorn

Staircase

2011-03-21T06:00:00.000-06:00

Light Above

2011-03-18T06:00:00.000-06:00

Stairs

2011-03-17T20:50:00.000-06:00


Stairs \| © 2007 Rachel Hawthorn

The Future

2011-03-16T06:00:00.001-06:00

This is the building in which I took my first class in the German department at CU. This fall, I'm officially a graduate student in the Art History program, with a focus on Critical Theory, and doing a secondary certificate in Critical Theory in the German and Slavic Languages and Literature department. I will be spending a lot of time in this building, I'm sure, learning how to actually speak and read German beyond the level of a five year old.

It Was Becoming All Too Clear

2011-03-15T06:00:00.000-06:00

Key

2011-03-14T06:00:00.000-06:00

Blanket

2011-03-13T06:00:00.000-06:00

Linens

2011-03-12T06:00:00.000-07:00

Sheets

2011-03-11T06:00:00.001-07:00

Ball

2011-03-10T10:23:00.000-07:00

In addition to the beautiful photo today, I'd like to invite you to drop by Flash Gallery at Working With Artists in Lakewood, Colorado tomorrow night between 6pm and 9pm. I have work in a show called Feminine Influence. You can read about it here (scroll down a bit) and ignore the fact that no one ever spells my name right.

There will also be a video component to the work I have on display, and that will be linked to a page on my website. Links to come soon!

Jellies

2011-03-09T06:00:00.000-07:00

Playground

2011-03-08T06:00:00.000-07:00

Winter Fence

2011-03-07T06:00:00.001-07:00

Wall

2011-03-06T06:00:00.001-07:00

Window

2011-03-05T06:00:00.000-07:00

Paris Two

2011-03-04T06:00:00.002-07:00

Paris

2011-03-03T11:32:00.000-07:00

Fog

2011-03-02T08:37:00.002-07:00

What makes a photograph beautiful?

2011-03-01T15:51:00.000-07:00

I decided to skip posting a photo today, and instead have some discussion. What is it that makes a photograph beautiful? Why is National Geographic successful in publishing a book (and website) of images that they can label as "Beautiful" when many will argue that beauty is a quality found in the eye of the viewer?

When you use Google Image Search to look for beautiful, any number of topics come up, but many of the images are of women. Now, women can be beautiful, sure. But does a photograph of a group of women from behind qualify as a beautiful photograph? Not in my view, but then, I don't typically like pictures of people.

What are the requirements of a beautiful photograph? Does it have to meet certain requirements for form, subject, content? Does it need to have technical perfection? Is beauty purely an emotional reaction? And if it is an emotional reaction - can negative content create a beautiful image?

John Moore/Getty Images
Mary McHugh mourns her slain fiance Sgt. James Regan at the Arlington National Cemetery
May 27, 2007
Memorial Day weekend

Is this a beautiful photograph? It is an award winning photograph, and the photographer was named NPPA's Photojournalist of the Year in 2008.

What about this photo?

A protestor holds a sign saying "Leave Mubarak" in front of a line of riot police in downtown Cairo.
by Anonymous photographer, January 29, 2011

Is that a beautiful photograph? It has historical reference, and contemporary relevance. It is not technically perfect, but the red tint to the image, the slight blurring of the focus, and the exposure errors all contribute to the image's sense of immediacy and emotional content.

What do you think? Are there photographs that you think define "beautiful" for you? Are there rules for "beauty" for you?

Winter Flowers

2011-02-28T06:00:00.001-07:00

Dark Winter

2011-02-27T06:00:00.001-07:00

London Bridge

2011-02-26T06:00:00.001-07:00

9:54pm - Independence Day (Swing)

2011-02-25T06:00:00.001-07:00

-ing past the top rail
for the first time since the fifth grade
when boys could see up my skirt,
the path-lights are shooting stars
the wind thicker than memory
an uncertain, dizzying prospect
10 clock tower chimes
echo the chain
jumping off is not an option

Radishes

2011-02-24T06:00:00.001-07:00

Pearls

2011-02-23T06:00:00.005-07:00


Pearls - © 2005 Rachel Hawthorn

In the beginning....

2011-02-22T13:11:00.003-07:00

...there was a blog. It was a very boring blog, for the most part, because it was just random commentary, an occasional photograph, and not much else.

On the first day, the blogger created content. She looked at it, and said it was good. Only, it really wasn't. And she was not happy. So, the blogger wandered through a bookstore and saw a book by National Geographic, called Simply Beautiful Photographs. And lo, there were in that book exactly what the title declared...Simply Beautiful Photographs. Then the blogger discovered the accompanying website. The blogger saw this, and agreed that it was good.

Now, since the blogger has no less than 6 ways to make photos, including a digital SLR, an iPhone, and 4 film cameras, and since Kodak has reissued the blogger's favorite color film, it would make sense that the blogger also tap into her training as a photographer, and try to also make some photographs that are Just Beautiful Photographs.

Because life needs more things that are Just Beautiful.

Babies

2010-01-29T13:31:00.005-07:00

This client is a single mother who reminds me a lot of my mom when she was first starting out, so I thought it was important to give her something that could be a visual of the bond between mother and son, when all is a bit chaotic in the world. She gasped when she saw it, because she wasn't really knowing what to expect. That makes me happy.

Stairwell II

2009-09-26T07:59:00.000-06:00

Moving forward....

2009-09-26T07:37:00.005-06:00

I've been spending a lot of time recently reflecting on what I want to do with my photography, the efforts I put into it, and into other works, the manner in which I craft projects, finalize them, display them, promote them...it's a lot of thinking.

I find that my typical approach has been to think think think, educate myself about an idea, and try to get the knowledge I need, before attempting a project. This has been a slooooow process. I also try to control/run every aspect of things...yet I am realizing that is something I can't do. So in that vein, I'm trying a few different things these days...spontaneous picture taking on my tumblr blog as well as posting works in progress, and shooting with cameras with delayed results - my holga (again) and a newly acquired Mamiya C220 TLR.

The TLR is a great camera to shoot with (though I don't know the final results yet - I haven't developed any film from this one - it may be full of light leaks, or a non-functional shutter, who knows) because it stops you from just putting the camera up to your eye - all the composition is done in reverse on the ground glass as you look down (I have been looking for the same top/focus setup for my Mamiya 645 as well) - which changes your interaction with the subject. I love the square format too.

In addition to being more open to my shooting (and willing to accept imperfections as happy accidents and learning opportunities) I'm giving up the effort of completely hand-coding and laying out my website...I need to get off the computer unless I'm editing, and be able to just click and push a set of images up to the web. I've been thinking about doing it all with wordpress (but haven't found a theme that does exactly what I want, and my "letting go" plan requires that I don't design my own theme - even though I could - I'm looking for speed and efficiency). With wordpress I could have this blog on my own site as well - though I don't know if that would mean *more* readership? Or less? Do people come to this blog through blogger or looking for this specific blog?

So, that's what I've been doing, mostly, and some shooting, and showing work, and working at my job, and working on some other projects (which require the website to be done before I get all public about them) - so, in a nutshell - anyone have an opinion on Wordpress themes as portfolios? And using a blog embedded in your site vs a public host like blogger?

Comments very welcome!

(Edited to add - this is fun: Rollip turns your digital photos into polaroid fakes. I ran the above picture through the process - I like!)

New Work

2009-09-06T22:49:00.001-06:00

Shows and Thoughts

2009-09-05T07:08:00.003-06:00

I have work on display at St. Marks Coffee House in Denver (2019 E 17th Avenue, between Race and Vine) for the month of September, along with several other artists from Sliding Door Gallery. I've got 4 pieces on display, 3 of which are older (from my thesis show) and one which is new, seen here. (I posted this image previously on the blog, and I'm reposting it for the purposes of this entry - I do love the image. )

In preparing for the show, which ended up coming together quite quickly due to a miscommunication about dates, I only had one of these printed (by www.iprintfromhome.com - highly recommended). It's a 20x24 print, and I took it over to Roach Photos (860 Broadway) for mounting. I like what they did. We decided to mount it on dibond, a plastic core substrate with a white surface, and laminate the surface of the image. Because the dibond has the white surface, and because in a public setting like a coffee house, edges are exposed to potential damage, I chose to mount the print with a 1/4" of the dibond exposed all the way around, rather than a flush mount edge to edge. The results were great - the picture looks like a black/white printed with a 'border' from paper carrier, and yet, it's not, which you can see up close. The guys at Roach did a great job of attaching a mounting bracket to back that I ended up using, and the piece installed quickly and easily. I'm really happy with the results.

However, it's got me thinking. What is the best way to present work? I've seen a few different mounting and presenting methods, and tried several different ones myself. When we went to the MCA last week we saw work by Kevin O' Connell that was flush mounted on dibond, and then framed with a 'floating frame' - there was approximately a 1/8" gap all around the piece within the frame, no glass. I loved it! Yesterday, I was at Composition picking up a new sketchbook, and noticed that one of their current artists had printed her work at 12x12 on 16x20 paper, then framed it with glass, backing board, and edge clips. It worked. And last night, at the Bill Adams show at RMCAD, I noticed several different presentations - mounted and framed, flush mounted with plexi, and the laminated mounts on dibond. (Turns out Bill was the "large order" that the guy at Roach Photos was talking about when he said he'd just done a huge order, and had some scraps left to cut me a one time deal on mounting my piece.)

And of course, looking back to my own work - the older pieces I installed at St. Marks were framed in heavy (HEAVY) black wooden frames, with plexi fronts, and a "shadowbox" effect so the image isn't close to the glass. It turns out that those frames haven't really held up well to the passage of time, being moved, shipped, installed, de-installed, transported here and there, stored...they could use a bit of work (and I could use a better art storage system, but that's a whole different discussion.) Not only that, those frames cost me approximately $180 each, which was a nice chunk of change to pay for an entire show at once.

So what's the right thing to do? In this economy, it seems senseless to spend $200 per image to frame, when I'm not getting that back (haven't sold a single piece of work all year). But at the same time, some places require a "museum quality" presentation to show your work, and it also seems that you should do *something* to present your work as more than a simple piece pinned up on the wall.

But wouldn't you rather spend that money making more pictures?

I'm not sure what the answer is, and I'd love to hear what other people are doing. Showing work on the internet seems to be a great way to 'exhibit without framing' and I think my site needs some updates to make it work better in that way (it's cute, but not working for me, and it's not done, which is an issue.)

So, if there are any photographers or other artists out there reading, I'd love to know how you're going about the framing issue - are you just not doing it? Do you print everything one size and swap frames out? What's the story?

Interesting....

2009-08-18T21:55:00.003-06:00

I'm interested in the idea of the internet as performance, and I think this piece is a great example of the performative nature that we all carry when we interact on the web.

The basic concept for Personas at the Metropath(ologies) exhibit at MIT is that you leave a digital trace, with every post, blog, comment, press release, whatever it is that appears about you on the internet. It's interesting in its flaws, however - it generated plenty about me, as I've shown in the image below, but my boyfriend (who has his own IMDB profile as a film producer and is quite well known in a few different communities, mostly based around film, rally racing, photography) has "no digital traces" - which I found quite interesting.

Check it out by clicking the link above.....

Sliding Door Gallery Summer Show

2009-08-15T15:38:00.003-06:00

I had the great opportunity this summer to jury and install a summer-themed show at Sliding Door Gallery. The video above is (hopefully) a slideshow from the night, with photos of the gallery, some glimpses of the art, a look at HOW BUSY! the gallery was, and if you look closely, a cute photo of my boyfriend outside the gallery next door.

It was a really great show, but also being on the planning/coordinating/receiving end of the work, I want to thank the artists that followed directions. :) I can't say how important this is. When you submit your work to a gallery for consideration, it is SO very important to submit the information they need in the format they request it. Just because you may have submitted it in the entry process doesn't necessarily mean the installer has all that information.

It is very frustrating for a gallery to gather information from multiple points, and this was an especially frustrating show behind the scenes with some other stuff that was happening in the lives of the gallery members, jurors, etc. However, the end result is that it looks good, and I'm so glad we had such a positive response!

The show is up for 2 more weeks, our hours are Friday and Saturday, 12-5, and the gallery is located at 766 Santa Fe, in Denver, Colorado.

fingerprints

2009-08-15T15:36:00.000-06:00

the corner room

2009-08-15T15:31:00.000-06:00

Announcing: Drought - Sliding Door Gallery, Denver, CO July 3rd - 31st

2009-07-01T10:58:00.002-06:00

Friday night is the opening for a new group show at Sliding Door Gallery - I'll have a couple new pieces on display. The show runs through through the end of July, and looks like it will be a good one - many other Sliding Door artists will also be showing work. I hope to see you there, if you're in town!

Details:
Opening Friday: July 3, 6 – 10PM (CLOSED JULY 4)

In this group show, artists of Sliding Door Gallery address the concept of drought with its various connotations. Apart from its literal meaning, "drought" can refer to the prolonged lack of anything material or immaterial. The wide interpretational field of this topic allows for addressing themes from the economic crisis to a lack of artistic inspiration. While the context can be on an individual or societal level, the issues can be emotional, psychological, financial, environmental, or spiritual, to name only a few ...

Regular Gallery Hours:

First and Third Fridays, 6 to 10 pm
Otherwise, Fridays and Saturdays 12 to 5

Sliding Door Gallery is located at 766 Santa Fe Drive, Denver, CO

Inspiration

2009-05-25T09:14:00.003-06:00

I'm participating in this artistic project, A Book About Death in New York. The idea is for 1000 artists to create an edition of 500 postcards about death.

Death and loss are a huge part of my personal inspiration. This set of images started with the loss of my grandmother, a woman who was highly influential and important in my life. But beyond mortality, there are so many facets to the concept of death, that it is a topic often dealt with by artists. As a way of coping, as a fascination, and as a way of understanding.

My day job involves a lot of death, as someone who works in a law enforcement photography lab. I see photographs of fatal crashes, and people who have been ejected from cars and motorcycles, car vs pedestrian crashes, and so on. In some situations, death almost becomes a mundane part of daily life. As artists, we should strive never to view death, or life, as mundane. The profundity of what we have, and how fragile it is, is ripe for a multitude of interpretations.

Elinor Carucci

2009-05-24T12:08:00.005-06:00

I've been thinking about Elinor Carucci's work a lot recently. I think it's the lighting, but also the subject matter that is drawing me in, because I'm starting to see intimate portraits in my own home. Last night, for example, we had a heavy rain (rare, here in Colorado where it's been quite dry) in the middle of the night. My boyfriend got up and stood before the window, looking out. Despite my complete inability to see without my glasses on, I was able to discern in the light and dark that this was an amazing image that I really should capture. I didn't though.

What intrigues me about Carucci's work is that she does stop, right there, in the middle of it all, and she will take that photo. In her Closer series, the one most every has as an introduction to her work, she has images of intimate moments with family members, with amazing lighting, it's sometimes a challenge to look at them and say "this is a setup shot" vs "this is a grab the camera as it's happening" shot - they all blur the lines both ways.

I've always felt a little personally reserved when making work, photographically or otherwise, and looking at work like this is both a pleasure and a challenge for me, because the images are undeniably beautiful, but also jarring in their bluntness. It may be my good old midwestern upbringing showing through - reservation and modesty are pretty good keywords for my typical mood and approach for looking inward.

But there is something in these images that makes me want to get out there and play with the camera, capture something, see something I wasn't seeing before....either because I wasn't looking, or because I was trying not to look.

I will not avert my eyes

There is a lot of work out there that deals with discomorting subjects, in such a way that you feel perhaps you should look away - but the photographer is in the middle of it, and if they can stand to stare, why should you look away?

I am going to try, for a while, to just take that shot when I see it. Carry the camera everywhere I go. Photograph the discomfort, photograph the light in the window at midnight...not with a final project in mind, just with the goal of getting a shot. Any shot.

Maybe in the end I'll post some of them here. Maybe I won't. But I won't avert my eyes.

In the meantime, look at some more of Carucci's work.

Things in the art world I am thinking of...

2009-05-21T17:47:00.002-06:00

1. Self Promotion
2. Residencies
3. The artistic community
4. Ego
5. Specifically, the Vermont Studio Center residency
6. Th mprtnc f vwls
7. Photogrammetry
8. Anxiety, Desire and Loss (isn't that always though?)
9. The Epson Stylus R1900 vs R2880 printer

What are you thinking of?

Worldwide Pinhole Day

2009-04-26T11:46:00.005-06:00

I'm terrible at remembering to get my butt in gear and set up for Worldwide Pinhole Day which is ....surprise surprise....TODAY.

You'd think I could at least keep this together, you know? It's been a busy month though, and I didn't quite make it out for the day, but I have before...the photo to the left is a collaboration from pinhole day 2007 with myself and Katie Taft - she brought some of her petit amis to the Zang Mansion where a large group of us gathered to celebrate/practice/experiment with Worldwide Pinhole Day, and I took off with her little sculptures, placing them about the yard and photographing them.

I've also done some of my own work with pinholes, like this house on the left, building my models and placing them in the landscape and photographing them with the pinhole camera.

Some people build their cameras out of oatmeal boxes, shoe boxes, or any other contraption. I like the ability to move about and be flexible when working with pinholes, so I bought a lenscap from the Pinhole Resource a couple years ago at the SPE conference. (Yes, even at a conference I can find a way to shop.) The pinhole resource is an amazing (dare I say it) resource for pinhole photography training, supplies, books, and knowledge. I bought the Nikon body cap from them, which allows me to run slide or print film through my manual nikon camera as normal, but adjusting the exposure for the teeeeeny weeeeeny aperture that is the pinhole.

I'm planning on moving up in scale to shooting pinholes with my Mamiya - I am ashamed to admit it, sort of, but I am not all that certain where my manual nikon is right now (that's what I get for moving twice in the last 16 months) - I am pretty hopeful that it's in storage (that's where I am hoping a LOT of things are located).

The nice thing is that I can shoot with the pinhole, get the film processed and scanned, then go in and do additional manipulations in photoshop, and then print it out, and then do additional surface manipulations, if I choose. If the image doesn't want all that work, I can just do a straight print (like the houses) - and it works just fine.

Pinhole photography is a flexible art that not only hearkens back to the beginning of photography, but it also has adapted to the current world - don't want to worry about film, processing, all that? Just buy a body cap for your digital camera! Want to experiment and go back to the old days, setting up a big camera, having people hold still, long poses, and highly structured images? Get a Leonardo 4x5, 5x7 or 8x10 pinhole camera. I know people who use these and love them - you can even use them in the studio with lighting for very interesting effects.

I'm planning on visiting Hawaii and Paris this year (and Michigan - you'd be surprised what you can photograph there) and I'll be taking my cameras and body caps to do some pinhole photography - it's an amazing way to slow down, view the world, and see what comes out with your images. If you can't make it for Pinhole Photography Day somewhere in the world, take time out to make your own camera, and give it a try! (this is also fun to do with kids).

Art-making/List-making

2009-04-16T09:58:00.003-06:00

I am lucky enough to be in a position to have vacation days at work, and earn them at a regular rate (which means I can predict when to take a vacation, how long I'll have, etc.) I am taking advantage of that system right now - I usually work 4 days a week, 10 hours a day, but I've taken today and Monday off, enabling me to have a 5 day break from work-related duties...

It's nice!

It's also my birthday present to myself, as I turn (cough cough) on Sunday.

I had a couple people ask me (outside of blogger world) what I would like for my birthday, and while I can't necessarily say I want one thing or another, I've compiled an amazon wishlist over the last several years - which works in multiple ways - I like that I can bookmark things that I want to pick up (research items, books that I feel would be helpful, recommendations I've received) and a way to buy them when I get a little chance to spend some money - but also, it helps to identify what my interests are - looking over the list as a whole a couple weeks ago, I realized I needed to split it into sections, as it was just too unweildy and complicated for anyone to bother scrolling through. Fortunately, you can move things around, rename lists, mark them public or private, and so on....so, I did.

And it became obvious that I have some very specific areas of interest:
Art, Photo and Theory (obviously, considering the title of this blog)
Memory & Trauma (with specific reference to the Holocaust, but also in a general sense)
Process & Practice (about being an artist, making art, etc.)

With everything else breaking down into Web, graphics, business stuff; Movies and DVDs; Other books and stuff...

Which makes it interesting. I post these links not as a "hey, it's my birthday, buy me something" (though if packages showed up at my door, I'd be tickled pink, haha. ) but more that I was thinking about it in response to another's request - and also in the light of what I am doing with my 5 day vacation from work. Part of the time is planned for the studio, where I have some boards waiting to be painted on, but also some of that time is going to be spent planning the future.

Due to a mixture of circumstances, some of my own making, others not so much, I was unable to finish graduate school the first go-round. Of course, I've been thinking about it again as life has settled into a steady pattern, and I've been more active in my work and in the community of artists (last year was not the best year for art making for me, frankly). I've had to really evaluate what it is that I want my work to do, and how I want to go about making it, who is inspiring me, why, and all that jazz.

So looking at these lists, I can begin to identify what I need to be doing, both art-wise, education-wise and professionally.

The patterns that I see also include the people I am looking at/inspired by, which helps to identify where perhaps I should be going to graduate school too - but not necessarily.

Anyway, in light of this, here is a list of who *I* am looking at - and if you have any recommendations to add to this list, awesome! Post them below. Post book recommendations too, if you see something on my list that makes you think of something YOU think I should read. I can definitely add to any list of things I want to read.

Artist/Writers I am currently Inspired By:
Dora Apel - Wayne State University Professor of Art History - I actually took one of Prof. Apel's classes way back in 1999 or 2000, as an undergraduate at Wayne State University before transferring to University of Colorado. She has definitely had a major influence on my thinking.

Artists:
Brian Delevie
Shimon Attie
Rachel Whiteread
Cardiff & Miller
Craig Kalpakjian
Emily Jacir
Mike Kelley

And this is by no means an exhaustive list (I used to have an exhuastive list online, but I deleted that section of my website. Ooops.)

Who are you looking at? Why? Have you identified any set areas of investigation? Was it something you set out to make enquiries into? Did you fall into it, realizing a pattern of ideas was taking shape under your examination?

I'd be interested in hearing from readers of this blog as to what/how you are getting to your "sources" of your work...

Up and Coming

2009-04-10T20:33:00.004-06:00

I woke up this morning about 6, and as usual, spent about an hour working on website stuff (for someone else - my site is still under construction....it's almost done though!) and then got ready to pick up my friend Kay Tuttle from her house. Our early morning sojourn was to head up to Fort Collins to Front Range Community College to meet up with an associate, Karl Dukstein, director of the art program at FRCC. Our job up there today was to jury the spring Student Art Show. It was no easy task, but it was a wonderful, fun, rewarding morning.

About 70 pieces had been entered into the show, and I can honestly say that nothing was bad. I am very impressed with what is coming out of FRCC's art department today. There is a conception among some college circles that community college art departments are 'hobby programs' - and yes, there are some students who attend these programs with the intent of brushing up their hobby skills. However, I caution people to NOT assume that is the case as a blanket rule - some of the best artists I know started at the community college level, myself included.

We saw a large variety of work, including a LOT of color and digital photography, some black and white photography, painting, metalwork, fabric arts, drawing, and more. It was a challenge to narrow down the field, but we started by eliminating work that was seriously lacking in some kind of attention to detail - and this was difficult. The rules we were presented with stipulated that the work was to be created for a class and produced in the last 3 semesters. We were cognizant of the fact that students can't always afford the best framing, so we didn't pay attention to that unless it was an obvious issue. However, there were some cases where just the addition of a piece of paper in a frame to provide a background to an image would have moved the print from the 'out' pile to the 'in' pile. Other things we had issues with were just production quality - dirty scratched negatives should be cleaned before printing, for example. However, for the most part, we judged work based on how it compared with the work in the same medium, and we consciously attempted to draw a broad selection of skill level and media, so alongside a matted and framed color print with a strong conceptual theme, we selected a simple black and white photograph of stairs - because it really is about looking and learning - and all the work showed some kind of learned value.

While we juried the work, we also had interesting conversations about not only our own experience with the work we were looking at, but also with past exhibitions we were (and weren't) juried into, and our educational experiences. Every artist goes through these experiences, and it isn't necessarily that you are a bad artist, or making bad work, if your work gets rejected. It may be that your work just didn't speak to that particular juror. Your work may not have been presented in the best light (a great learning opportunity) - or there just may have been something better.

In some instances - *some* instances - if you have a question about your art, and why it was or wasn't included, you may be able to ask the show organizers if you can get feedback from the juror. In previous times that I've juried shows, I've given each entrant a written paragraph of feedback, or I've made it known to the organizers that I'm more than willing to provide feedback. I think that this is especially important in student shows, because sometimes, it really isn't that your work is bad. It's just...something. And I wouldn't be able to tell you what that was until we had a conversation about it.

But the moral of the story is *don't give up* - rejection happens. It happens forever, basically. One of my professors in undergrad (just a few years ago) went to a portfolio review event, and received negative, brutal feedback about her work. Less than a year later, she received a Guggenheim fellowship. Just keep going.

As far as the show goes, I believe it opens on Monday the 13th, and the award ceremony is on the 22nd of April. Congratulations to ALL the artists who entered. It takes guts and courage to submit your work for judging, and it is all part of the learning process. I am honored that I, along with Kay, got to have the opportunity to see your work, and I am VERY excited by all of it.

I'm standing behind you

2009-03-27T05:37:00.004-06:00

Some of my work is currently on display in the Words Works exhibit at Abecedarian Gallery, and it is a phenomenal show - I am so thrilled to be included in it. The amazingly talented artists that Alicia Bailey selected for this exhibit are outstanding. I pretty much went through the whole exhibit nudging my boyfriend and saying "We should buy that. Oh, we should buy that. Oh, that, that right there, we should buy that!" I've never been so enamoured with a show before...and that I was in it too? That was just too much.

The opening was on the first Friday of March, but since that's the big "opening night" in Denver, it was just way too crowded to head out there. Instead, we went last Friday to the artists reception that Alicia Bailey held, on what is being called "Collector's Night" - a less traveled 3rd Friday of the month. There are still crowds, but it's about 1/5 of the First Friday crowd. It's a much better vibe, because you get people that are really looking at the art, talking to each other about it, and you can over hear their conversations.

The work I have in the show is my family secrets series - I guess it's a series....that was first shown at Altered Esthetics gallery in Minnesota for their Dirty Little Secrets show. It's a piece that's been slowly improving, and what I really needed to make it better was to actually sit on it for some time (which I did - the beginnings of this work came out of my studio in the fall of 2005) - and it's ready to start growing again. This is wholly due to seeing the work up in the gallery, and hearing people's reactions to it. One girl was looking at the whole piece, and just leaned over to the person next to her and said "It's so sad" - and she sounded really sad too.

Hearing that made me really happy!

Not because I like people to be sad, but I love being anonymous at galleries when my work is up, and listening to the reactions that people have about the pieces. When I am in a show, I try to be present at the opening, but not really "present" - more behind the scenes. Usually, I'm pretending to just be a patron, because I want to hear what you have to say without trying to impress me, or make me feel good about my work. So the collectors night reception was an amazing opportunity for this, because I could linger near the work on occasion to overhear the reactions...and those reactions make me think of further ways to push the work.

It's making me really think about the lifespan of an artpiece, and how really the "completed" piece is defined. I guess the fact that I see additional room for this work to grow means it is a 'series' - and the individual pieces themselves are also 'works' - and they do fit into a larger body of work that I do, based in text, memory and loss. I've been thinking about it since that night, and I continue to think about it. I'm a big thinker when it comes to my work. I'm slow about it, methodical, thoughtful....mabe a little of a procrastinator even. Not because I am lazy, but because I really just put a LOT of thought into the work, and then when I sit down and *work* on it, all that compressed thought from the last however many days and months of thinking just pour out into the work. I tend to explode like this in a lot of my working styles too....think heavily on something.....and then obsessively work on it for 30 hours straight.

Which brings me to my favorite day of the week - Friday. For a lot of people with jobs, Friday is the day that the week is over, and the end is in sight...but for me, Friday is the weekend. I made arrangements at work for a 4/10 schedule, so I work 10 hour days Monday through Thursday - Friday mornings I wake up bright and early (5:20 today) and I've got 3 whole days in front of me, all scheduled for me. My boyfriend works all 3 days, so I get a big open studio to myself (he gets to work in it M-W by himself) and the coffee pot, and the freedom to walk about the apartment ranting and raving and thinking, and stopping, sitting and reading, and so on...in peace. I love it.

And today is Friday. I'm sitting here at 6 am, watching the neighborhood being plowed after yesterday's blizzard, and seeing the soft pre-dawn light of civilization in snow, and I'm so happy. It's Friday.

PS: There is a MUCH better picture of me and the work posted at Denverarts.org.

I'm in another show this month!

2009-03-03T06:35:00.003-07:00

Abecedarian Gallery Presents:
Words Works
an exhibition of regional and national artists who use text as both a conceptual and visual element in their work

March 6 - April 18
Artists' reception Friday, March 20 6-8pm

Abecedarian is located at 910 Santa Fe Drive, Suite 101
Denver, CO

Artists in the Exhibits
Denver area artists included in the exhibit are Gail Watson, Joan MacDonald, Katie Taft, Kirsten Vermulen, Kimberly MacArthur Graham/Kathryn T.S. Bass, Lara Schenck, Mia Semingson and Rachel Hawthorn.
Also exhibiting are Evan Jensen (Annapolis, MD), Donna Price/Juliane Leitner (Asheville, NC/Altmuenster, Austria), Heidi Zednik, (Asheville, NC) Melissa Duckworth (Royal Oak, MI), Sue Anne Rische (Lubbock, TX) and Tate Foley (Athens, GA).
Special Events

Artists' Reception March 20 6-8pm
Open First Friday (March 6) 'til 8
the district is crowded on First Fridays
for parking/shuttle info click here
NOTE: Abecedarian has a no food/beverage policy on First Fridays and closes earlier than other galleries in the district.

Artist Talk: Rachel Hawthorn on Architecture and Memory

2009-02-20T14:38:00.000-07:00

Artist Talk: Rachel Hawthorn on Architecture and Memory
Saturday February 28th, 2009
4PM
Sliding Door Gallery
766 Santa Fe

SDG Artist Rachel Hawthorn will be speaking at the gallery about Architecture and Memory, and how it relates to her current body of work on display in the gallery, Memory Houses. The Memory Houses series is an ongoing study of the way the domestic architecture of our past frames our memory and experiences. Rachel Hawthorn has been studying the concepts of architecture and memory for a few years now, and investigates the topic in her artwork and research. Rachel graduated in 2004 from the University of Colorado - Denver with a BFA in photography, and has taken graduate courses in photography, arts and the humanities at both Bard College in upstate New York, and at the University of Colorado, Denver.

The lecture will start at 4 pm, and will be followed by an open format question and answer session. Free to the public, but you might want to bring a cushion to sit on, SDG doesn't have a lot of chairs.

Questions? rachel@rachelhawthorn.com

Showing Off

2009-02-09T09:10:00.003-07:00

Friday night was the opening for my solo show at Sliding Door Gallery, and it was a ***packed*** house. I'm always amazed by the feedback you overhear when people don't realize you are one of the artists showing the work.

The gallery was set up so that there were two solos in the space, a series of painted portraits by Berndt Savig in the front, and then my Memory Houses series was in the back space. I tried something different with this show since I had all that space to work with, and included in half the space my original Memory Houses drawings, which were drawings from memory of floor plans of houses I've lived in at some point in the past. The drawings were made on sheets of photo paper and then not processed, so the paper alters and shifts throughout its life as it reacts to the various lights that it is exposed to. I've shown these works once in a gallery setting, so the color shifts have already started to happen, but I'm interested in seeing what happens from here on out.

On the other side of the gallery I showed the black and white photos of the model houses I had built from memory, again omitting details I had no recollection of, and then photographed in the landscape. The final piece was the Bliss Cycle video I'd shown in the group show, I decided to just leave it up for another month for more exposure.

This show came together pretty well, I think. Because the drawings and photographs were so frot loaded with process before you actually get tot he image, I felt the need to include an artist statement this time around, and I'm glad I did. I noticed that the people who looked at the work briefly and then breezed on through seemed to react less to the images than the people who looked over the artist statement - they seemed to react really positively. I even had one person come up and inquire about my thought process, and ask some great questions - and that was cool. But then you get the people who dismiss the work out of hand...and that's where the whole 'opening' becomes a frustrating process.

This month, though, since the work is up, I am going to take advantage of the space and location, and have a critique of my work, and an artist lecture at the end of the show before it comes down. I'll be busy all month putting that together, and I"m looking forward to it. Even though I'm still in the process of getting my in-home studio completely set up (because it's shared, it's been a little hard to get everything the way I want it, on the timeline I want...but it's ok) I feel like I've really been productive this year already...I had a piece in the show in January, got this show up and together for February, have another piece in a show in March, have submitted for another show in Texas in March, and I am working on rebuilding my website, which has been a good exercise in designing a public face. Since my day job is also a design and web type job, I've been basically spending All. My. Time. immersed in the creative process. This has been fun, and it keeps me going. But the artwork itself, that needs to start moving forward, which I hope will begin to happen again in a more concentrated fashion by the end of this month, as I am really working on getting the studio up and running.

I'm curious about other artists and their studios.....if you are reading, send me an email with a picture of your studio, or reply here with a link to a picture on flickr, and tell me what kind of work you do in your studio, and how you manage your studio practice...

Techno Geekery

2009-02-02T10:43:00.004-07:00

I am kind of a technology geek.

I'm not nearly as proficient or skilled at technology as other people, but when I am looking for something to make my life easier, I always turn to technology.

My newest obsession is the Action Method, specifically their online platform. My usual method of organizing projects is the "multiple stickynote" method - which works until you start to lose sticky notes, write over them, fill them up until they become cryptic, and what if the sticky notes are one place, but you are another?

Enter Action Method.

The screenshot above is my 'dashboard' - accessed online. It allows you to delegate tasks to other people who also use the method, and break all your projects into manageable actions. I've even created "brainstorming" actions.

I am working on transitioning my entire office to the Action Method, and I currently use it at home as well as part of my studio practice. It helps me get ready for things like upcoming exhibits, managing my website updates, and dealing with smaller projects - even tracking the ideas I want to blog about, read about, research, etc.

I'm currently reading a book about Virginia Woolf, and her approach to creativity, relationships, and life in general. One of the key concepts that resonated with me is that you will, in general, produce successes and failures in consistent proportion to each other throughout your creative endeavors. The way to 'guarantee' lots of success is to work like mad, consistently, constantly, and continuously.

This is the way I like to approach life, in general - manic, obsessive and full of directions to go - and things like Action Method can keep me organized and sane while continuing my efforts of moving forward.

The book concepts also help me understand that sometimes, my work is goin to suck, and absolutely perfection can never be acheived. Each edit in one area leads to an edit in another area, and constantly going back to revisit and rework a concept on the minute level can only be a descent into madness. Sometimes, you've just got to Let. It. Go.

That's not to say that one should be sloppy, and say "good enough" when the work is indeed not "good enough" - there's a baance between trusting yourself, and trusting the work. This is the hardest part of all - I've always been a perfectionist in many ways, and that's why my production volume is pretty low when it comes to my creativity. I'm hoping that this year will be more stable (no moving!) so that I cna make this increased production a priority. I've already been exhibiting and entering calls for entry more...this is a good start. Now to make more work.

Sliding Door Gallery presents two solo exhibits, February 6-28, 2009

2009-01-19T21:37:00.004-07:00

Sliding Door Gallery presents two solo exhibits, February 6-28, 2009

Berndt Savig
A Forced Intimacy: Recent Painting and Sculpture

On display at Sliding Door Gallery beginning February 6, 2009 are recent paintings and sculpture by Berndt Savig. Returning to the female figure and visage as the primary focus in this body of work, the paintings are psychological studies of imagined individuals with introspective, pessimistic or emotionally withdrawn demeanors. The larger scale of the paintings creates a forced intimacy with the viewer.

http://slidingdoorgallery.org/artists/current/berndt-savig-gallery/

AND

Rachel Hawthorn
Memory Houses

Memory Houses is an in-progress series of images that continues Rachel Hawthorn's exploration of the way our domestic environments shape our memories and perception. Each image features a model of a house that Rachel lived in, constructed of only the parts remembered. Anything that is forgotten has been left out. These models were placed in the landscape and photographed from different perspectives to enhance the experience of the distances between current perception and memory of the past.

http://www.rachelhawthorn.com
http://rachelhawthorn.blogspot.com/

Sliding Door Gallery

766 Santa Fe Drive
Denver, CO
~~~~~~~~~~~
Open First Friday 5 to 10
Open Third Friday 12 to 8
Open other Fridays and all Saturdays 12 to 5

Road Trip

2009-01-07T10:44:00.005-07:00

I'm anxious to get road tripping again.

In 2008, I drove to Michigan/Indiana/Canada. IN 2007 I drove back from New York in a UHaul, taking the southern I-70 route. In 2005, I took the route TO NYC with my friend Patti in a uHaul,and in 2006 I was in upstate new york with a car anyway, so I drove all over the place.

It's 2009, and no trips are planned - I was thinking last night about going to the SPE national conference in Dallas in March - some friends are driving to that...though I don't know if I can swing it, either with days off work, or the cost of the conference/hotel/annual membership (though I've been a portfolio reviewer at the last two conferences, a planner at the last conference, maybe they can swing the conference fee for me this year.....though I'm not a big name reviewer...we'll see.)

I have a friend who flies for Skywest too, so that would be a good way to fly down there cheaper if he can get me seats.

But road tripping.....my friend Nathan just came back from New Mexico, and Patti is down there now, plus I have two other friends who are from Albuquerque, so I've had New Mexico on the brain lately.

I'd love to drive down and see the wide open skies (even wider than Colorado skies) and perhaps take a visit to the Lightning Field, then maybe cruise through to see White Sands, and even get a little crazy and drive over to Marfa, Texas to see the Donald Judd stuff at the Chinati Foundation, and look for the Marfa Prada.

I just feel this itch in my skin thinking about getting up and going...free space, open...get a couple horses and ride out...grab the video camera and make some images, wandering around in the small towns of the southwest.

But I don't know. Time, money, budget, workloads, and I'm thinking about a couple other projects that require me to be here. So. We'll see.

Culture Push Artist Residency - Call For Entries

2009-01-06T11:26:00.002-07:00

This came through my inbox this morning, and I thought I'd share it with those of you who might be interested:

CALL FOR SUBMISSIONS:

Genesis Project, Philadelphia

Artist Residency Program

Genesis Project is a unique month-long artist's residency catering to body-based artists who identify as working between disciplines and/or seek to integrate other disciplines into their performance practice. Genesis Project places emphasis on experimentation and open-source collaboration. Artists or professionals from art-related fields will be brought in for regular workshops and lecture series throughout the month. We seek to diversify the range of skills present in the residency, therefore the committee will also consider applications from artists working in non-performance disciplines, and professionals from art-related fields, who want to integrate performance into their practice. Genesis Project is directed by Arturo Vidich and sponsored by Culture Push, a non-profit art company dedicated to giving people of all backgrounds access to life-changing ideas. The residency will be hosted by Basekamp, a non-commercial studio and exhibition space in Philadelphia.

Application Deadline: January 15th, 2009

Notification: March 1st, 2009

Residency Time-frame: Sat. August 1st through Sat. August 28th, 2009

Residency Overview
Application

It looks like they are looking specifically for NY and Philly area artists, and one from abroad, so that may limit the opportunity a bit, but residencies and other options like this are a great way to expand your resume, portfolio and experience.

There is a lot of emphasis on graduate school as the way to build your portfolio, but there is also a lot of talk post grad that the work made there is not relevant to the work people are making in the real world. I'm not sure how I feel about that declaration. Graduate programs are incubators in a way, where small groups of people are being fed a lot of the same information, and the ideas are being filtered back and forth through a lot of shared experience. This gives you the support system you need to really take a chance with new angles in your work, but the real work, what comes later, after you get out, needs to be strong and not nearly so self referential. Residencies allow you the opportunity to get that same sort of feedback cycle - in a shorter time frame, with more independence of thought - everyone coming to the residency is at a different level in their work, criticism, and experience.

One of my goals this year is to successfully apply to a residency - it depends on a few factors, not the least of which is money, time and work. But the week that many of the smaller residency programs offer is a nice break to make just work, and can be possible to swing a little easier than a month, or 2 years (such as a grad school break.)

"It's performance art, or something, honey"

2009-01-03T11:48:00.004-07:00

A mom was wandering through the gallery early in the evening last night, looking at the work. Her daughter was drawn to my piece, a shelf with a small dvd player with my Bliss Cycle on repeat. At the time, it was showing the hand washing sequence. The daughter pointed, and the mom said "I don't know. Maybe it's performance art. Or maybe it is a video with instructions on how to wash your hands. Lets go, mommy's looking at the art."

She didn't actually stop to look at the piece, listen to it, or read the title.

That's an interesting dilemma. I'm used to the varying weird responses to my work, in print form anyway...there was always the "Blair Witch" reference to the Archaeometry series, and then Lord of the Rings references. My color work didn't seem to generate so much oddness, people really love the stillness of the images, probably because it's relatively straightforward work.

But last night was the first time I've shown the video in a gallery setting. The Bliss Cycle is a series of 3 videos (Pick, Sweep, Cleanse) compiled into one DVD which I set up to loop continously. All three videos come from a single static viewpoint. In Pick, a hand is seen picking paint off the wall. Sweep is just that - a broom rhythmically sweeping the floor in one spot while completely missing the obvious dirt and dust just beyond its path. Cleanse shows someone washing their hands, and then the sink, and then their hands, and obsessively trying to clean all visible surfaces.

The purpose of the piece is to have a discussion about the desire for perfection and domestic bliss, and the manner in which a narrow focus can lead to the impossibility of realizing that bliss. It's a little referential of older feminist video and performance work, but still pretty 'now' - especially with the economy crashing down around us - domestic bliss becoming further and further from view, when so many people can't even pay their mortgage, buy the food to feed their family, and more.

It's poignant for me personally, with some of the changes I've experienced as well. The videos were all made in another time and place, but they came together only recently and meant more to me, as I've moved on from a past relationship, and moved forward on a new relationship and that idea of domestic perfection is much less a focus now. Just paying the bills is a success these days.

Fortunately, we moved into a new place where I don't have to decide between "work space" and "social space" - the new apartment includes a studio space for me! I'm really excited about getting it set up and done and ready to work - I need some shelves and cork board, and that's it, I think. The light is good (3 huge north facing windows) and a huge closet for storage, and plenty of room for shelving, the boy's video editing stuff, and the wi-fi connection for blogging, web site updating, and so on....

I feel in general though that the video got the 'correct' response - a lot of people picked up the headphones and watched for a while, some made it through the entire set, others just watched for 30 seconds or so (it's about 10 minutes in total). So, we'll see if we get any response or feedback. The show is up for the month of January at 766 Santa Fe Drive in Denver.

Opening: Friday, January 2, 2009

2008-12-29T20:08:00.002-07:00

Sliding Door Gallery has moved to the heart of the Santa Fe art district, and we hope to see you there on Friday night, January 2nd for the first group show of the gallery artists!

It's a gorgeous space, immediately north of the famed Sandy Carson gallery, and promises to show quite a bit of talent and variety in the space.

Hope we will see you there between 6 and 9 pm on the 2nd!

BIrds

2008-12-10T12:00:00.001-07:00

I've been working with birds lately.

It's the Economy....

2008-10-11T09:46:00.002-06:00

And it sucks.

I wonder where the art market will go, and what will happen in the next few months. I know that personally, I'm sitting in less than ideal circumstances, though people are still asking for wedding photography, portrait photography, stuff like that...but what about the artwork? Can I afford to frame a piece? Can I sell the pieces that are sitting in my closet?

I struggle with a couple different approaches to the work I am doing - it is easier to sell a straight print, I think, because it's understood what you do with it: buy it, put it in a frame, hang it on your wall. What about a projection? What about a web based installation?

The nice thing about web based pieces, I don't necessarily need any additional $$ to make them, but I do need the infrastructure to stay in place. Showing the work in a gallery is another story though - I need monitors, computers, internet connections, etc. People need to want to get out, galleries want to show work that will sell....

It's a struggle - I recently joined a co-op gallery for $60 a month as a full member, but the advantages of the 'full membership' haven't really evidenced themselves yet. I thought it would be a good deal - but they've decided to not have group shows, saying people are tired of them....so. I hve to wait until it's my turn to have the solo show - spending $60 a month, $720 a year - basically the cost of framing a show - and I don't necessarily know when the work will be shown, or what work I am doing.

It's a struggle, for sure. I could use that $60 elsewhere, in a tank of gas to head out and take some pictures, or to go to the art supply store to get powdered graphite for drawing, or to put money into savings, just to know I have it....

I wonder what other people are doing in 'hard economic times'?

Moving Pictures, Perception, Space...

2008-09-25T09:03:00.003-06:00

This post is kind of all over the place today.....

Moving Pictures

I've been a Nikon girl as long as I've been able to make pictures, but I'm always willing to throw over a company for another that provides better, more interesting, more effective materials and tools. I'd almost be willing to consider the new Canon camera - I can't write anything about it in particular, but if you pop over to Vince Laforet's blog, you'll see some amazing visuals.

Shooting moving pictures has been an interest of mine for quite some time (and there is a small moving picture project in the works right now coming from my studio) - so the combination of SLR performance with high resolution video capabilities sounds amazing. My boyfriend is a filmmaker, and he was quite impressed with the review as well, coming at it from the moving pictures POV.

So, we'll see....$2900 is a hefty price, but I could see sharing it..... :)

Perception

I was talking with a co-worker this morning about perception....there are some things going on in my life that have this at the forefront of my thought (and it's always relatively there anyway, because of the work I've been doing - memory, perception - quite tied together) - anyway...I'm not in a place to post eloquently about it right now, but I am thinking about it, and more may be coming along soon.

Space

I'm sharing my space (592 sq feet) with another person. This is the biggest small experiment I think I've ever undertaken. It's good, I mean, don't get me wrong. I voluntarily invited this person into my life, and my space. This is the good part. The hard part is figuring out how two photographers can work together, when at the moment we have one desk and one computer. I think we are going to have to break down and get a second laptop, or a desktop - and a large monitor, which I've been wanting anyway.

The space issue will probably not be a big deal for long...we will eventually move up to something bigger, but here is where I'd love input: ~Studio Space~

Is it better to have off-site studio space, or a room in your living space? Have you had both, or either?

I am a co-op gallery member, so I at least have a venue for showing and sharing, so traffic isn't necessarily the primary issue. The main issue, however is that I do need a place to work, have studio visits (invited) and the ability to work work work....and I sometimes wonder if an in-house studio is the right idea. Compound that with the second person needing a studio (his work is more film based, but still, he needs room to work, store stuff, etc) - have you shared a studio? How do you get your work done?

I'm not necessarily afraid of sharing a studio, but the idea of picking the right thing, and making it work, makes me nervous....what if I pick the wrong thing, and my work gets paralyzed?

The good thing is that we've set a goal - I've got a few goals in mind, but the new space has to be decided on at the end of January, no later. My lease here is up at the end of February, and I'd like that extra month to move things over, paint, get set up, etc.

Working for the man, or woman, as it were...

2008-09-15T06:46:00.002-06:00

You may or may not have heard about the big Jill Greenberg flap going around (short story: unflattering outtakes from John McCain photoshoot at the Atlantic Monthly, cackling gleefully about the manipulation of the image, etc. - read more here, plus links to the broader kerfuffle).

I'm not going to get into that specific flap here because it's adequately documented elsewhere, but my curiosity is piqued with the greater question: as a photographer with (or even without) a separate fine art career, when hired for editorial work (at a pittance, really) how should one approach the work? Do you look at it as an opportunity for exposure, or do you look at it as a necessary evil? I was told recently that regardless of where I worked, there would always be politics, and unfortunately, one has to learn to play the game in order to get their own needs met.

So, does a photographer take that contract to photograph an individual they don't particularly like, then take the extra frames and create a scandal, use them for their own purpose, etc, or is it more appropriate to actually rise above the fray, and either say "Thanks, but I don't think I can do justice to this subject due to my own personal feelings, so I'll have to pass", or see it as a challenge - make the image, make it real, make it heartfelt, and maybe even make it less than flattering, but still meeting the needs of the client?

Where does one draw the line? And where does one decide what really to do about editorial?

I've done editorial work myself. Two magazine covers, a story about breweries, and a local artist. I am a hired photographer on a daily basis, producing editorial, documentary, news and creative images for a state agency. In fact, today I'll be documenting a major event in the state, all for pay. With the magazine work, I have been lucky to not have conflicts between the story and my personal opinion, and in general, I can support the mission for my agency where I work on a daily basis. However, if they are paying me, I think it is for my creativity, not my politics.

This topic has been covered and discussed elsewhere, too, so it's by no means new. Liz Kuball wrote about Todd Hido's editorial work in July of last year, with followup discussion by Andrew Hetherington, for those that want to read more (and I'd love to come back and discuss more, for now I've got to scoot and see about that aforementioned national event I'm covering today, and no, it's NOT a campaign visit.)

In the meantime, I hadn't seen this yet, but Beth Dow won the Blurb book contest. Cool! I own one of her prints from the 20x200 collection. Congrats Beth!

Maybe I'll be ambitious enough to go over her work and post a little review here.

...Punctum...

2008-09-08T09:49:00.002-06:00

Not so long ago, and kind of but not really far away, I was with a group of painters who had, en masse, read Roland Barthes' Camera Lucida, and proceeded to mangle the very concept of punctum. Rather than internalizing the moment, the emotive power of the 'punctum' as conveyed by Barthes in the essays in CL, they grabbed on to the punctum and studium as being actual, physical elements of the painting...I recall sitting in a room with the painters, a wall covered in work, and one person walking up and pointing "There, there! That's the punctum!"

I wanted to scream. Still do, sometimes, because it just got under my skin so much.

But isn't that the thing about theory? Don't we all have different interpretations of what this dead guy means versus that dead guy? And why this german dead guy more accurately represents what we're saying, but the culture has changed so much that now a not-dead Slovenian guy should be taken as gospel instead?

I began this all with the intent to revisit an oft linked, oft read post that I still want to make sure you have read, A Practice Without Center, a post on Sophie Calle. I know, I've linked her more than a billion times (ok, exaggerating a bit there) but still, she's the penultimate source for my ~~artistic inspiration~~ creative reflection. Her work is problematic, challenging, tends to oversimplification, overcomplication, and general polarization, but I think in relation to the concepts of the Studium and Punctum, it's an essential work to study as practice for the ideas presented by Barthes.

Whether this relational effect is based on the shared French nationality, I don't know. Is there a mood/personality/mode that comes from a certain type of place (France, USA, Canada, Brazil, Mozambique, etc. etc.) that tends to allow for the theory created there would relate more directly to work created there?

I'm interested in continuing this discussion... I'd love to read your thoughts below.

Intimate Spaces

2008-09-07T10:42:00.003-06:00

My interest with my photography has been interiors for so long, it isn't surprising that I would find interest in the Bedroom Series on flickr by user imjustincognito.

This guy has got some really great images in his flickr albums, but this one caught my eye because of the total un-self-conscious appearance of the models. The whole series is interesting for the fact that, as mentioned in the artist's statement, bedrooms, and bedtime, are one of the most intimate aspects of a person's day...when you sleep, you are vulnerable, defenseless and unaware (like this morning when my boyfriend kissed me good bye at 5:30 - at 9 am when *I* woke up, I had no recollection of it.) Tied in with photographing people in their personal sleeping space really allows us, as the viewer, to become intimately involved with the models.

In viewing these images, I wondered sometimes "does this person really sleep in that?" and other times "Wow, I wonder what color that paint is on the wall." The reality of bedrooms, and real people, is also a contrast to what we see in design magazines, or design blogs (where I found this, via a Design*Sponge link). In this case, it is as though the art world can be a rejection of celebrity, and 'pretty' and instead gives us just the real, a view of what people are really like. This becomes an opportunity to see the world we know is out there, but can't really understand as real, because of the inundation of 'glamourous' images we receive via the media all the time.

I never was one for the work of people like Ryan McGinley or others who photograph people having just too much fun, and who show their friends as these "ultimate" hipsters, but when looking at this, I could a) imagine for the most part these are new york apartments, just based on my experience, and b) that these are real people, people like you and me.

I like that.

Thoughts?

We interrupt this broadcast....

2008-05-13T18:59:00.002-06:00

or rather this *lack* of broadcast.....to bring you an important message.

This blog is not dead!

I will be blogging soon!

I've had some major (major/catastrophic level) life changes happening here, and this got put on the back burner, as did my personal work.

So, there will be a gradual restart, as if from point zero. I am starting over, but with the benefit of past knowledge. We'll see how it goes.

As it stands, for those of you who are wondering, and those who might be curious.....

1. I still work at a job I love....i make photos, websites, do video, graphic design, etc for a living for a public entity.

2. I am no longer a graduate student. The student lifestyle and I parted ways, to allow me to focus more completely on my work and what is going on in my life.

3. A myriad of other experiences have been accrued, including loss, death, moving, and more, so it's been a bit of a rough past 6 months.

It has had positives though, despite the rough bits. I'm fine, I'm safe, I'm healthy and have a roof over my head and my equipment. I have the love and support of friends and loved ones. I have my job, and I have myself.

Let's roll.

So this is the new year...

2008-01-01T09:17:00.000-07:00

And I apologize for the DCFC reference so early in the post. It is 9 am, I'm working on my first cup of coffee, and reviewing the year that just passed. I traveled a lot, I got a new job, I started working on a few major projects, I left a critique group, joined a committee, and built a garage.

So, The Year In Review - in case you missed it (and this is very vague - I'm doing this from memory):

January: Started the year in Omaha with a severe case of the flu. Started this blog. Took a class on Modernism. Froze my butt off while waiting for the great blizzard winter to end. Sat on a panel about Art and Music. Had a show at the Symphony.

February: Hm...I'm sure I did something. Oh, I made a book out of iron. That was pretty cool. Otherwise it was one of those busy prep-months for March.

March: Miami! Miami was awesome, stayed for 4 days for the SPE conference. Built a bunch of tiny houses. Worked in sculpture more consistently than I had before - more on this later.

April: I got older, as I do every year at this time. This one kinda hit me though, 31 felt just *so* much older than 30. I also did my first public art installation, got a write-up in the paper about it, and officially became a member of the SPE National Conference 2008 Local Planning Committee.

May: Gosh....May was a bunch of downtime, I think. Good though. Downtime can be very therapeutic. Oh, wait....I had a show at Vertigo. Had to get that printed and framed. I think I also had a show in Fort Collins in May....I seem to remember these two shows being back to back.

June: I saw a lot of local art in June. I finally made it out to the first Friday events, and headed over to RMCAD for the solo show by Viviene LeCourtois, and made headway on the gallery list for the SPE conference, as well as coming up with the Month of Photography plan with Mark Sink and Sabin Aell.

July: Started up the MOP blog (303photo.blogspot.com)...Quit the critique group I'd been in for so long, and also helped host a baby shower for a friend. Built a 2 car garage in my backyard too.

August: Shot a wedding, had a busy and stressful month at work, so not much else got done.

September: Applied for a new job. Kept being stressed.

October: Went to Europe! Shot a wedding in Scotland, saw a Tacita Dean exhibition in London, went to the Louvre and saw some wonderful art, spent ***hours*** in the Centre Pompidou looking at modern art, went to the Palais de Tokyo, and tried (unsuccessfully) to convince my husband and sister that 25 euros was TOTALLY worth paying to go to FIAC! which was in town at the same time. Alas, no luck. But we had a great time and will go back. We also saw work at the National Gallery in London, and had an all around lovely time. Meanwhile, I was showing work in Minnesota as well.

November: Started my new job!

December: Sat on a panel at PlatteForum (more of a public critique than panel, but there were a bunch of us, taking turns talking, so there you go). Submitted my thesis proposal (of which I am QUITE proud), coordinated some photo shoots for my job (I'm basically the creative for this major recruiting project involving billboards. I am loving this) and then at the end of the year, flew to New York City just as a snow storm was cancelling flights out of Denver. I was never so happy to be in a first class seat - especially because when I got to New York, I got up the next day, helped a friend re-pack her 12' moving truck, and we turned around and drove *back* to Denver. This is a trip I did in reverse 2 years ago, same time frame, but this time it was much harder. We got a late start in New York, didn't get any farther than Pittsburgh the first night, and then stayed in a really disgusting hotel room. The second night we rewarded our push to Columbia, MO with a GORGEOUS brand new room at the Residence Inn - I am swwearing off any other hotel chains other than Marriott from now on - and then tried to make it home on Sunday - unfortunately, a ground blizzard in Kansas closed the road locally, and we had to stop in Colby for the night. I made it back to Denver for a quiet New Year's Eve at home with my husband, and was in bed by 10 pm.

---

But! It's now a new year. My goals:

1. Apply for 3 residencies (PlatteForum is one, the other two to be determined)
2. Consider restructuring my work schedule for a new photo based project I am thinking about...this will require a week day off, so we will see... not impossible
3. Send out responses to calls for entry at least 2x a month - with at least 1 each month being non-local, and 3 for the year being international
4. Get my FCP certification completed.
5. Start working with Katie Taft on our super cool project
6. Oh, and I'll probably try to work out and be healthy or something like that blah blah blah.

I have never been a real resolutions oriented person. I don't feel like I need a special day to start doing something, when I want to get things done. This is more like a business goal, for most of these, so it's just sensible to frame them in the year cycle.

I did start thinking about something while on my trip back to Denver with my friend. When I was an undergrad, I took photo and sculpture classes. I loved photo history, I loved art history, and I loved all the classes, but had to select a specific track to be on - which ended up being photography. In looking at where my work has gone now, there is still a photographic element to it all, but there is also a strong sculptural component...and I notice that a lot of multi-disciplinary art jobs out there end up in the 'sculpture' departments....despite the fact that I don't know much about lost wax casting (i've done it, have no idea how to order shell or specific melting temperatures for the various metals, etc etc) and couldn't safely calculate load weight or anything like that...but I like sculpture. I have decided that my 'real' title is less photographer or artist using photography, but just an artist. I have a hard time classifying myself, and I don't do specific things like paint and make collages, or make photographs of specific things. All my work has been interactive, so this is what my real goal should be for the year - make work with the interactive, interdisciplinary framework in mind, rather than 'how is this photography' as the repeating question.

I wonder how that will change my work?

PlatteForum

2007-12-25T14:44:00.000-07:00

I'm on my way out to visit friends and brave the *very deep snow* we've got here in Denver today, but here's a little something to share: a video clip from This Week In Denver featuring information about Platte Forum and the current artist in residence (and friend, and artist and arts community builder extraordinaire) Katie Taft.

Click here for the story and video....you'll probably want to pause the video until you've got a decent amount loaded in the buffer before watching.

Great Job Katie!!

Done! Completed!

2007-12-23T18:10:00.000-07:00

I had to finish a major bit of work, a packet for submission to my thesis committee, and it is due the 1st of January. I finished it all tonight, so I am now ready to have fun!!

Too bad the traditional Sunday night TV is being replaced by Spiderman, who is not my cup of tea.

Anyway, in the meantime, I wanted to share with you my newest installation. It hasn't been exhibited anywhere yet, so any feedback is welcome, which may make the work better. One of the things I realized about my work as I move away from straight photography (which is not a surprise - I wrote about land art and happenings most of the time in undergrad, and my biggest influences were Andy Goldsworthy, Richard Long, Allan Kaprow, and Marina Abrimovich) I am really focusing on the action and intereaction aspects of the work. My older projects (Archaeometry, Tiny Houses) had an element of action documentation in them, but as my work has developed, I am expecting people to intereact withthe work, and almost requiring it for the work to be completed.

It brings about the question of the role of the viewer in art, and whether work exists despite the viewer or only because of the viewer - or even in this case, an active and willing participant.

The piece that I am posting here is tentatively titled Sketchbook, and is a variable dimension installation with a table, plastic cup with Uni-ball micro pens (black ink) [the only pen I will use] and a stack of 8 1/2"x 11" paper. On the paper is a a word or phrase from my sketchbooks (which go back several years and encompass my research, my sketches, my project information, and sometimes just random notes). The paper is stacked up, and people (viewers) are invited to participate in the piece by reacting/responding to the words/phrases on the paper. I feel like I can continue to add to the work but at each exhibition I will exhibit the same pages including the responses that have already been recorded by other viewers. I'd be happy to hear any responses you may have, or suggestions of artists to look at, changes to make, etc.

In the meantime, for those of you doing Christmas, here's wishing you the best, and for everyone, a very happy new year full of wonderful things!

Wow.

2007-12-20T22:06:00.000-07:00

Life has been SO BUSY.

It's good though, I love it.

I'm working on a billboard project, and some web stuff. In the evenings, I've been working on my thesis, and the Month of Photography, SPE conference, and oh, trying to keep my house clean, dinner made, celebrating Hanukkah, reading books, etc etc etc.

Crazy, y'all. Just plain crazy.

But it's good. I'll be going to New York City next week for a mini-break to hang out with a friend (and help her move back to Denver) which means dinner at Beast for sure...always a good time.

In the mean time:

Platteforum just wrapped their most recent artist residency with Katie Taft - check out the resulting work until January 2nd.

if you're in NYC - Francesca Woodman's work is on display at Marian Goodman gallery - go see!!

--

My thesis work is moving forward smoothly....what's left to see is whether it's approved by my committee for exhibition. I don't feel like talking about it much here, but I'm really happy with some of the work I've been doing, and I have a few other steps I am ready to make....this weekend will be a big work weekend getting things ready to submit to the committee. I'll probably post images *after* I get things together and sent in the mail (they want it all by the 1st of January) and have some time to feel like I can live in the work, you know?

I've also been tasked by my (very awesome) boss to find an award that I can compete for...I'm not sure how things like Center might fit into this charge, because while I am working on small projects, I don't think any of my current work is yet 'project-ready' - but maybe soon. I do have a goal of doing a ride-along at last once a month, not just with officers in our local districts (Golden, Adams County, Castle Rock, etc - all within an hour of our office) but also with officers with completely different daily tasks - the immigration task force, Summit County, or even (especially) the Western Slope - get a sense of what images represent their day to day work, and how they are dealing with working in the field.

It's an amazing job, I really feel so very busy all the time, but in a good way...like I can keep going because I just have so much to do, but also it's not stuff that breaks my heart (oh, gee, another stack of paper to file????) and makes me want to run away.....

So. Yeah.

With that, I need to break this short, because it is 10:20 and I need to be at work in 10 hours, and tomorrow is the shortest day of the year - something that always feels important and special to me. I want to see the sun rise, then set, because once it does that, I know we're in for 6 months of progressively longer, brighter and warmer days. With this 'year' closing out so beautifully, it can only get more positive from here on out.

Peace to you!

Catch a falling star....

2007-11-22T09:35:00.000-07:00

When I pulled into my driveway Monday night after work, I happened to glance up and see a HUGE fiery ball rocketing through the sky just above my house. Meteor? Falling star? Aliens?? I have no idea, but it would have been really cool to have a camera in my pocket at the time (and a tripod, and nothing in my hands) because it was really beautiful, and lasted long enough to actually comprehend what I was seeing. I didn't make a wish, only took it as a sign of good things are coming, and beauty is all around, as it's been a crazy crazy month.

I finished my deadline project for the SPE conference brochure. If you don't know what SPE is, you should check it out. It's a great organization centered around photography with a conference that occurs once a year in March, and then has regional smaller conferences in the fall. What I like about it is that there is less 'gear' talk (though that does exist) and more practice talk. Artistic practice is huge there. At last year's conference, I was sitting with some friends around a table on the lower floor of the Radisson Miami. We all had our portfolios out on the table and were talking about the big things - ideas, visions, etc etc. We took turns flipping through our work and people stopped to look over shoulders, talking about this or that image. Younger (and not by age, I mean in terms of education and years of practice) photo students would come by and the "how" questions would emerge, but we all made a point of sharing the why as the primary answer to the photographs on display. It was this moment, sitting there, sharing, that made me feel *so* connected to the other artists in the field, especially because over the past few years, I've been feeling rather...afraid might be the word... about my work. It has been a rough go...I've been crazy busy (I know, excuses) and my health hasn't been 100% physically or mentally, but I'm on an upswing, I can feel it. Things are going to start to work again.

Part of this has to do with a change in environment. For two years after graduation, while attending grad school, I worked a front desk position in a Student Activities office at a small college, with a very liberal boss who allowed me to do web stuff, photoshop stuff, and all sorts of my own miscellaneous work while at work, since our workload was slight. Then I switched positions, and the atmosphere wasn't as fun and lighthearted, nor was it as free as the previous position. I still had moments of free time at the new job, but my allowed at work activities were limited to actual work type things. I know this is a standard practice for many, and I tried to adapt by doing things like taking my laptop with me to work at lunch on my own projects, or blogging in a word document. This was all fine, but the general atmosphere was NOT conducive to being productive. I thought I was able to stick it out, but in the last few months, it got incredibly toxic. It wasn't the workload, or the restrictions, or the hours even: it was the people (and I really do have a point here.)

So. When the perfect job description came along, I applied for it, and I got the job.

I started this week. Heading into it, I was concerned about how I would feel doing 'creative' work all day long, and then come home and spend 3 hours in the studio as well. So far, it hasn't been a problem. In fact, my brain feels like it's waking up from a fog. I came home on Tuesday and said to my husband "So, today at work, I went to a place. I took pictures of things. I then went back to my office, and I downloaded the pictures. I edited them for best shots, tweaked exposures, and resized copies. I burned and labeled CDs to send to people. I uploaded pictures to the internet. And they PAID me to do this!!"

I love it. The new job is perfect. I am a photographer for the State Patrol, and my position is at the Patrol Academy, so I am around troopers and cadets all day long. I have a pretty office with good lighting. I have 2 20" flat panel monitors to do my work. I have purchasing power to say "I need Adobe Lightroom, it's a much better photo editing workflow for this type of work." and then I will get Lightroom (ordering it tomorrow!). Yesterday I got to ride around with a trooper and photograph while he assisted motorists in the snow. I have a Nikon D200 that is mine. A photo studio that I can reorganize and design to be MY space. I have two rooms that I get to reorganize and redesign and my boss says "it is your space, we will do whatever you say we should do with it."

This is the first time I have ben hired for a job where they actually wanted me, my skills, my experience, and what I specifically could bring to the table, as opposed to just the presence of a living body that could function within the parameters of the position. They want me here. *ME* - and that makes the world of difference in how I feel about going to work. When my days are spent just following rote instructions, I have to cope with not being able to think my way through every problem, and I get bored. Sure, at first I would try to offer solutions, but every one was met with a roadblock. Now, I am told "Yes, your ideas are great! Let's do that!"

So, the moral of the story is this: I type very long winded posts, but if you are in a job where you are getting the life sucked out of you, and you can't enjoy coming home and doing your work, do what you can to make a change. It doesn't necessarily have to be a change to a career path, just something where the atmosphere is better. Toxic work environments will kill your creativity faster than any limited budget or schedule.

More to come...I owe you all a continuation on the Sophie Calle/Christian Boltanski post, and I also want to dedicate a post to some very fabulous photography/art events that have happened.

photo © NASA

Waiting is the hardest part...

2007-11-05T08:31:00.000-07:00

And I feel like the last couple years have been spent with a lot of waiting on my part. I keep busy, sure, but there have been various things in the wings that have subjected me to the schedules and opinions of others.

Now, I am on my own schedule (yet one that's a widely accepted social practice) of having to work the two weeks after giving my notice at a job in order to start a new one. The waiting finally got me this weekend - instead of waiting to find out if I made the next round, waiting to find out if I am qualified, or waiting to just find out, I just dropped it all this weekend. I waited for nothing. I did nothing. I thought nothing. I barely read, wrote, photographed or blogged. I did a lot of staring at the computer - perhaps it's something I needed to do, because I've been running like crazy for so long...with the SPE gallery list getting wrapped for publication, hanging a show last week (p.s. I'm in a show at the Denver City and County Building), traveling (never as restful as you'd expect) and getting ready to visit family again this weekend (another rushed and harried weekend trip) - perhaps the complete lack of intelligence for my weekend was a result of being SO. TIRED.

But the meat of this matter is this: I start a new job on the 19th. And that job, for once, and for all, is related to my education, finally. It's not an academic position, but government. I'll be working as a photographer officially, instead of punching my card day in and day out as an admin. This is huge for me.

What it means in the terms of my work, however, I don't know what to say yet. Will working with all of my brain all day mean I am going to be exhausted at the end of the day? Will it inspire more work after the door closes behind me at 5 pm? How does working at what you love affect the work you love to do that will (unfortunately) not be classed as work in the eyes of the general public? I am in the situation where a daily 8 hours of work is required, and I can't go to my studio when inspiration strikes. It has long been a source of frustration to me, though I've assuaged those emotions by taking jobs that were "just for the money" and thinking I'd get through - though getting through is more and more of an effort when you realize how much of your brain you're NOT using. It's frustrating.

So now, I am going to be doing photography, video, production, editing, layouts for web and print....and more. What will this be for my work? I don't know. It actually is increasing my monthly available funds too, so I don't know HOW this will all play out. But the main thing is....I am doing work that will challenge me, and push my skills to the limit.....and here's the fun part: I get paid to use a Nikon D200 and my new desk has 2 20" flat panel monitors. Wheee!!!!

10 goals - Updated

2007-10-31T21:37:00.001-06:00

1. ~~Hang the show tomorrow~~
2. Continue the blog post about Sophie Calle, Tacita Dean, Christian Boltanski and Paul Celan
3. Send images to be made into slides (I shoot my documentation digitally and have slides made through www.iprintfromhome.com - I've been VERY satisfied with their work.)
4. file all the receipts from the Europe trip
5. Finish reading my book (Jews, God and History - Max Dimont)
6. Finish 'sketchbook project'
7. Document 'sketchbook project'
8. Submit 'sketchbook project' to 'works on paper' show at Core
9. ~~Meet with Tom on Friday about show on architecture and space for March~~
10. Apply to Macdowell colony residency

10 goals.

I want them all done in 10 days.

I think that's fair.

Sur la douleur et la mort

2007-10-27T19:56:00.000-06:00

As far as morbid blog post titles go, that might be up there. However, I'm not speaking of pain and death in experience, but in art.

In Paris, we had the chance to go to Centre Pompidou, and it was one of my favorite days in the city. I could have spent quite a lot longer in the building, but we didn't get there until after 2, and the combination of crowds, contemporary art, and hunger tend to wear out my sister and husband, so we only lasted for about 4 hours - which is still quite a good run. Fortunately, in that time I did get to see the installation of Sophie Calle's Douleur exquise (Exquisite Pain). In another room, I saw Christian Boltanki's installation that investigated his own past and history in vitrines on the wall.

These two artists are in my top ten of people who I look at obsessively, and who continue to influence my work. (Others on list: Tacita Dean, James Turrell, the writings of W. G. Sebald and Paul Celan, Francesca Woodman, Shimon Attie, Rachel Whiteread, and David Leventhal) With Calle, I am completely entranced by the way she throws herself into the work she makes. She becomes her project, and the project likewise is her mirror.

The Douleur Exquise project is one of my favorites by far in the diaristic nature of the work, and one that translates beautifully into book form. The book that I bought is a small grey hardcover with cloth binding, and shimmering red page edges and accents. Inside, the french text sets off the images that countdown the moment to Sophie's exquisite pain, the breakup with her boyfriend that is the source of this entire project - and then the countdown from the day of that pain to the final and complete end of the project.

In the museum, the piece is displayed as 2 photographs and two embroidered text panels, and they had a grouping of three of these sets. I knew which project it was immediately upon reading the lines "Il y a douze jours, l'homme j'aime m'a quittée" and then sat for a moment with the work. As a piece on the wall, it is interesting to look at for the contrast of the images with the text, and the idea of embroidering each of those words that describe the searing anguish of a breakup, and then the pain and suffering of others as they relate their experiences to Calle upon her return to Paris.

In book form, it is an even more intimate journey. Turning each page, reading each piece of text with the contrasting stamped image as document of the trip to New Delhi and back, with the photograph of the telephone on the bed as the center image in the book, one feels the advance toward the fateful note...yet is powerless to stop the advance of time. Like a wave receding from the shore as well, the return journey is muted...Calle's phone photograph on the left page with her text, a companion piece on the facing page with text, printed on matte surface pages rather than the gloss that preceded the message she received.

You forget you forget
the words turned flint in the fist

flashes of punctuation
crystallize
at your wrist,

out of the earth's
cracked crests,
pauses come charging

there, at
the sacrificial bush
where memory flares up,
you two are taken
in One breath.
-Paul Celan

For me, both Calle and Celan have something in their work that seems to be difficult to acheive: a raw, bloody edge that isn't embarrassing or over emotional. In the case of Sophie Calle, it's the meticulous approach that she uses, analyzing and cataloging every single object, token, word as source material... life as archive. Celan uses such evocative words and textures that it reduces the tension of the emotion and brings you back into the space of language, then back again into emotion, and again into language... like a pool of water just over your head, as exhaustion sets in, you continue to bob up for fresh air and yet you find yourself slowly slipping under the water... into the comfort of drowning and darkness.

to be continued......

The Macdowell Colony

2007-10-27T12:31:00.001-06:00

THE MACDOWELL COLONY ANNOUNCES NEW FUNDING FOR ARTISTS

The MacDowell Colony, the leading artist residency program in the United States, is pleased to announce the establishment of a new fund for artists. Thanks to a generous grant by The Leon Levy Foundation, artists accepted for a MacDowell Fellowship who need additional financial assistance are now eligible for such aid. These grants can be used to cover expenses that continue to accrue while artists are away from home, including rent, utilities, and childcare. Artists may also use the grants to compensate for lost income or in the event an employer requires an unpaid leave to attend the Colony. Equipment and supplies may be addressed by this aid, as well.

The MacDowell Colony, which was founded in 1907, provides Fellowships to more than 250 artists each year across seven contemporary disciplines: visual arts, interdisciplinary art, architecture, film, theatre, literature, and music composition. Set on 450 acres of beautiful woods in rural New Hampshire, MacDowell’s reputation for offering the ideal environment for creative pursuits is well-established and highly regarded. Past Fellows include such luminaries as Milton Avery, James Baldwin, Leonard Bernstein, Willa Cather, Aaron Copland, Thornton Wilder, and more recently Jonathan Franzen, Bright Sheng, Oscar Hijuelos, Eve Sussman, Qin Feng, and Stewart Wallace, among many others.

Offering 32 private studios designed for the specific discipline of the artist, the Colony also provides meals and separate accommodations. Artists who are accepted to MacDowell through its highly competitive application process are allowed up to eight weeks of undisturbed time and space to pursue their work. The criterion is talent as demonstrated in a work sample that is reviewed by selection panels in each discipline. Application deadlines for the three annual residency periods are January 15th, April 15th, and September 15th.

The Leon Levy Grants are part of an overall effort by MacDowell to ensure artists face no barriers in finding the time and space necessary to create. This program expands on a similar successful program for writers established in 1997. In addition, through The MacArthur Foundation and the David and Rosamond Putnam Foundation, MacDowell reimburses the transportation costs for international and domestic artists for travel to and from the Colony. Permanent funding for the financial assistance programs is being sought.

“While MacDowell Fellowships are awarded based on exceptional talent, we believe that as many as half of the artists who come to the Colony each year struggle financially,” says Cheryl Young, MacDowell’s executive director. “A review of financial information indicates that the average income for aid applicants in literature in 2006 was 22,000 dollars, with 48 percent of these households falling below the poverty line. It’s wonderful that The Leon Levy Foundation is making it possible to expand this program to Colony artists of all artistic disciplines.”

The Leon Levy Foundation is a private, not-for-profit foundation created from the estate of Leon Levy, a legendary investor with a longstanding commitment to philanthropy and humanism.

Celebrating its Centennial this year, The MacDowell Colony was awarded the National Medal of Arts in 1997 for “for nurturing and inspiring many of this century’s finest artists.” It is the only artist residency program to have received this prominent honor. MacDowell has served as the model for residency programs throughout the United States and internationally. Since its founding 100 years ago, such communities have become the nation’s largest source of support for individual artists. For more information about the Colony or to apply, please visit our Web site at http://www.macdowellcolony.org

courtesy of eflux

A means to an end...

2007-10-27T09:49:00.000-06:00

Brian Ulrich posts some great insights on process, editing and bad images on his blog.

I'm working on a post, but it's taking a while.

Many Happy Returns

2007-10-22T11:43:00.000-06:00

I adore traveling, but there is nothing like returning home after a trip to your own home, and your own bed.

In the past 12 days, I slept in several different places, with several different levels of satisfaction, quality and price:
The floor of Heathrow airport (not recommended at all)
An air mattress in a flat in an old home in Scotland
A king sized bed in a hotel on Edinburgh's Royal Mile
A twin bed in a ~~basement~~ garden level room in London
A red velvet bed designed to mimic the set from La Traviata in a 400 year old building in the 5th arrondissement in Paris.
The twin bed in London again

And at last, last night, in my own bed which is pretty luxurious if I do say so myself.

I saw art, including the Wandermüde exhibit by Tacita Dean at the Frith Street Gallery in London, I ate much food, I drank plenty of coffee and wine, and took hundreds of photographs. I will try to create a cogent response to the works we saw, but not in this post. Instead, here is a picture of the sun setting over Paris from the Eiffel Tower.

I came home to lovely surprises too, my 20x200 print arrived while I was gone, so now I have a frenzy of art and photo activities - mostly framing - to schedule into my days.

Just a little something.....

2007-10-10T08:34:00.000-06:00

Jenny Holzer posts on twitter, and she's on my rss feed.

There's nothing like coming in to work and seeing "Calm is more conductive to creativity than is anxiety" running through my blog roll.

See more Jenny here.

We leave in a few hours. There may or may not be posts from the airport once we get through security, since we have to check in before 6 but our flight doesn't leave till 8:30.

Heavy Metal, Travel, and more...

2007-10-09T10:05:00.000-06:00

I am not a fan of heavy metal, but this movie actually looks pretty interesting: Heavy Metal In Baghdad. And apparently, the band needs some assistance. From Christian Patterson's blog:

Acrassicauda

Acrassicauda are a heavy metal band from Baghdad who have been displaced by the war in Iraq (and are currently living in Syria). On October 10, 2007, the band members’ visas will start to expire, and the Syrian government will not renew them, meaning the band will have to return to Iraq, where “the chances of staying alive there are zero percent,” according to the band’s blog.

Vice Films, Switzerland Design and The Emporium Gallery are collectively partnering to organize a benefit photography exhibition in Montreal on Friday, October 26, 2007 to raise money for Acrassicauda, with the goal of helping the band to leave Syria for a safer haven. Any photographs that do not sell at the exhibit will be put online at www.heavymetalinbaghdad.com. 100% of the revenue from these sales will be used to assist Acrassicauda

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I am home from work today wrapping up a HUGE list of "Things That MUST Be Completed" because I am flying out tomorrow to the UK. I'll be shooting a wedding in Scotland this weekend, and then next week will be split between London and Paris. We will miss the Frieze art fair, but I'm hoping to convince my travel mates (my sister and my husband) that we should indeed spend 1 day at FIAC in Paris...I don't know how successful I will be in that venture with tickets at €25 each....though maybe they will want to do something else while I do that. I don't really know. I think it would be awesome, anyway.

I'm working on a list of all the shows that are up in London and Paris right now, and it seems my attempts to see a Tacita Dean exhibit is a series of missed connections worthy of her work - shows closing days before I arrive, or being just too far out of the region we're staying....C'est la vie.

I may post some pictures from the trip while we are there, I don't know how much internet connectivity we'll have (though I will have the camera and laptop with me, due to the working first half of the trip). I have a million and one things to do before we leave, but at least I don't have to work today. So. See you when I get back!

Banff Center Residency

2007-09-28T13:40:00.001-06:00

From my mailbox, to try to scare away the dust bunnies here. I'm busy working, but I'll be making time to apply for this residency, you should too! Residencies are important for working artists!

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Hello!
We have an upcoming deadline for the residency : Making Artistic Inquiry Visible. This residency will take place in May and June of 2008 and the deadline for applications is October 15th, 2008. Below is a brief introduction to the topic of the residency:

Making Artistic Inquiry Visible (MAIV) brings together a group of artists, writers, curators, and other creative and cultural producers to explore the relationships between research and artistic practice. Much has been said and written about research on visual arts, but there is relatively little about research for visual arts (the array of practices that both inform and constitute artistic production) or research through visual art (where artistic practice becomes a vehicle for producing and presenting new knowledge).

For more information, please visit :
http://www.banffcentre.ca/va/residencies/
http://www.banffcentre.ca/programs/program.aspx?id=628

Or, you are welcome to contact me if you have any questions.
Hope you are all doing well!
Sincerely,

Sarah Fuller
Photography Facilitator, Creative Residencies
The Banff Centre
107 Tunnel Mountain Drive
Banff, Alberta
403-762-6611
sarah_fuller@banffcentre.ca

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Never Try New Things

2007-09-19T18:38:00.000-06:00

Argghhh.

I sent an email today to my mailing list, letting them know about the show mentioned in the previous post. I noticed a small button in the corner of my gmail. I thought I was sending a small note at the top of the email that would include the info, or perhaps a downloadable 'reminder' for those who might be interested.

No. No, no no... That is not what it is at all. It turns your simple text based email into an *evite* google style.

This sucks, because I like to be *low-pressure* about my marketing efforts. No harrassing people, no evites, just an email with an image and a little bit about the work, then dates, times, places. It doesn't help that this show carries the amusing title of Dirty Little Secrets either. One person on my list replied with nothing more than "?" and I can't say I blame them, now that I know what this email looked like.

So, Mailing List, I apologize. And I offer this as warning, which seems obvious, but OBVIOUSLY is NOT: Don't try something new on your mailing list that you haven't seen in action with your own eyes. That button might very well be the equivalent of the hamster dance in annoyance, and not nearly as cute and fuzzy.

I've got a secret.....

2007-09-19T09:40:00.000-06:00

I went home last night after an 11 hour day and opened up the envelope that had been delivered over the weekend. Inside were the prints for the Dirty Little Secrets show in Minnesota at Altered Esthetics...(their spelling, not mine)....and they are GORGEOUS.

The images that will be shown are re-worked Family Secrets images, better text, better layout....and this was the first time I'd seen them printed as C-prints rather than on my crappy little inkjet printer. I am IN LOVE with this work. You should see it.

Each image is a full sheet of grey that perfectly matches a grey card in certain lighting...but then shifts as the light shifts. The text is solid black and floats in the picture plane in a way that appears to almost remove itself from the flatness of the paper....and the paper! I chose a glossy surface so that people viewing the images at eyelevel will see their own reflection in the image (something I do often with my work) and can in certain ways internalize the text to extrapolate it to their own family dramas.

I am so in love with these images right now. I love love love them. The web versions do NOT do them justice, despite the fact that they were created *entirely* on screen. I need to get them in the frames (tonight) and ship them out (tomorrow) so they arrive in time for the show. I need to work on the second piece too, so that I can ensure it is properly displayed on screen for the exhibit.

Opening reception Friday the 5th (I won't be there, however, as I'm in Colorado and I'll be leaving for Europe 5 days later...no time for a trip to Minnesota)

Show Title: Dirty Little Secrets
The show runs October 4th -27th
Altered Esthetics
1224 Quincy St NE.
Minneapolis MN 55413
612.378.8888

We're from the Government, and we're here to help....

2007-09-17T09:43:00.001-06:00

I saw this line last week on someone's blog, so it cracked me up to no end when one of my portrait clients used it this weekend. Only, it was a bit scarier coming from him, as he works full time as a lobbyist at the state capital.

I've been having a good run of work.

I have work in a show in Minnesota next month, and the prints arrived this weekend. I have yet to open them though, because I haven't gotten the frames, and I want to keep them clean. That's on the schedule tonight though, in addition to some emails that have to be answered. I had a meeting last week with some local gallerists/artists (in this town it seems to be a dual role) regarding our Month of Photography event for next March, and I had the aforementioned photo shoot this weekend. I got a grant application in, and I'm working on two more, and I have a set of letters that needs to go out to get letters of recommendations from some various peers and professors.

I like being busy, but I prefer being busy on my own work, like this. Liz Kuball posted a couple weeks ago about the importance of a day job in funding your projects and interests...but I wonder if this is a misguided statement, brought on by years and years of history (ie: you go to work, because *that is what productive people do*) - And I'm not knocking Liz when I say this either....what I am actually talking about is that I vented my frustration with my *day job* and how it interferes with my photograph and studio work, and one of the people present at this rant said "well, if the art work is the stuff you do later, maybe you just need to think about it as a hobby."

OoOooohhhh boy.

See, for me, this is NOT a hobby. I did not spend 11 years in school to be a really good hobbyist. It's my work. Everything else is the stuff that gets in the way. Why do I get up in the morning? Art. That's it. It's born out in the evidence: my netflix queue is filled with research related dvds (I'm currently trying to work up the nerve to watch Memento. Not gonna happen tonight, I'll be home alone.) When I want to wind down, it's blogs and books about art and photography. I squeal like a child when Amazon delivers new books to my door (as it did on Friday: Archive Fever, and The Education of a Photographer) and I spend my time geeking out on the workflow to better produce whatever it is, be it images for a client, or images for myself, or not even images, maybe just learning to animate things in flash or play with the software I have to make even better work.

Not a hobby.

This is not my downtime.

And this has been a great time for me, this past few weeks, I've been getting busier and busier, but as that happens, I get more and more resentful of my job. It makes me wonder how other artists do it? I wish I could say that by quitting my job, setting up shop in a studio, and charging reasonable rates that I know I could pay the bills (part of me believes I could) but I know there is no guarantee. So how do you do it? How do you get through the day without whining in your blogs (as I'm doing now).

Come lunch time, I'll post a snapshot of my newly tidied workspace. I'm pretty proud of it. It looks professional, especially considering it's my dining room table. I'm thinking of turning the spare bedroom into the dining room, since I'm doing all my working in the actual dining room. Who's to say I shouldn't! :)

Just like a woman...

2007-08-28T19:28:00.000-06:00

I've been so busy. It's not even good busy. It's a new semester at the university where I work, and I've been working non-stop every day. I don't have time to check email, and by the time I get home from work at 6 or so, make dinner, play with the cat and dog, do laundry, try to finish some work for clients and work on my own stuff.....man. I am beat.

So the blog gets left behind.

Sorry about that.

I do insist on taking my lunch hour every day however, and I sit in the nearby park and read. This past week it's been revisiting selections from Photography at the Dock: Essays on Photographic History, Institutions, and Practices, specifically "Photography After Art Photography" and "Just Like a Woman", the essay on Francesca Woodman.

In 1998 I went to a show at Cranbrook and there was the first time I saw work by Francesca Woodman.* I've been in love with her work ever since, but have always felt a slight discomfort with it. I feel like it's easy to love her work from a feminist perspective, to see the blunt manner in which she confront sexual difference in a way that is still incredibly sensual and evocative...and incredibly feminine. It's also easy to fall in love with it on the heels of tempestuous teenage years as a riot grrrl. Her work could easily be the visual key to the anger and frustration behind albums like Live Through This and Little Earthquakes - different sorts of anger, but still, I *knew* the emotions I felt when I looked at the work.
I still feel uncomfortable with Woodman's work...it's like a girl crush. I love the work so much, that I consciously avoid trying to be too much like her in my work, pre-editing what I originally think are great ideas like "Hey let's take pictures in an empty house! - oh, use color film, black and white is too FW!" I don't know if this kind of obsessive navel gazing is the same for everyone, but I know that I do obsessively ponder the work I am making, and I tend to work on a few different projects at once, just to try to avoid either getting stuck in a rut, or to try to get a new perspective on what I'm doing. The rut is really happening with the digital work right now, and it's complicated by the facts of working on a platform that is essentially driven by a completely different goal than that for which I am using it. Search failures, inventory glitches and just plain old frustration with looking at the computer are all issues I'm dealing with now. In order to get out of my rut, I keep looking at this essay on Woodman....how she approached the ideas she was working with,
and kept exploring the specific themes of feminine sexual identity within a general working style yet the work never seems stagnant...oppressive, yes, but stagnant and same, no. I still am challenged by her work, and this oppressive honesty may be part of that.

So what does that mean about my work? Well, I'm still always working on the same idea, but I wonder how much of my idea is an academic exercise for myself, vs a real life artistic process and project. I question myself constantly, and wonder if I am really doing good work, or just playing around with the lofty idea of being an artist and above all of this. (this is an especially troubling thought when I am not thrilled with my job.) But still, I work at it, constantly. I wish I was like some artists I know who can constantly post their newest work online and keep showing their progress (Yes, Amy and Liz, I am looking at you!) and I admire their bravery. I just can't do that. Instead, I work quietly and rant and rave and fume in the studio and get mad and buy expensive equipment because then I am less tempted to throw it (I have been known to throw paintbrushes and piles of prints in frustration, books too). Tomorrow I'm trading my dining room table and cramped studio for a completely different environment though, to try to get some new energy flowing. It may be the end of summer that's causing my frustration (I also hate all my clothes right now and I am ready to start wearing boots, tights and turtlenecks again) but I am going to plow right through it with pictures that move. I'm lucky enough to be near such a cool place as Denver Open Media, and tomorrow and Thursday night I'm taking an advanced field production class that should help get my creative juices flowing again. I've worked in video before, but only two things I've done are to the point where I am willing to show them. And even now, I'm getting to the point that I will probably pull them from my website soon, because the exposure is all off, and the audio is completely borked. After Thursday, I should technically know how to work a nice pro camera and use those manual controls to get the lighting and sound right. Let's hope so.

I also went out and got myself a new bit of software which will help a little bit - once I figure out how to use it! I got two pieces into a show in Minnesota in October, one of which is a web based work that I've never shown before....so I am trying to figure out the best way to present it in the setting that the gallery offers. And I got an email from the journal that I've been a peer reviewer for, they're looking for book reviews, so I'm looking around for the ideal book to review. What do I want to read for free right now?

Anyway, thanks for bearing with me through my self absorbed chatter. I am much too interior to be able to write a stellar blog about the state of the art like Jörg does, and I'm too self conscious to post each new piece I am working on like Amy and Liz....but I'm also too much of a chatterbox to stay off the blog entirely. So, thanks for sticking around. :)

**All images in this post are by Francesca Woodman and the copyright resides with her estate.

*though now that I am looking at their website, it was either before 1998, or it ws in 2000 at the portrait show that October. I can't recall which...the portraiture makes sense though because there were other portrait works there as well.....

Construction Zone

2007-08-20T22:07:00.000-06:00

So, I've mentioned before how I'm using Second Life for a few different projects. I'd like to share with you some of what can be accomplished - namely, what *I* have accomplished in SL.

First of all, I bought 1.5 times more land to build on. I'm working on a proposal to get a free chunk of land that is HUGE - basically enough to suit my needs. And I've been building.

As I may have mentioned before, I'm working on a project that explores the way memory is shaped by experience, and is centered on the domestic spaces of the past. Rather than going way way back and getting some easy nostalgia from Victorian and Edwardian era fixtures and wallpaper, I'm reaching back into a time that I at least remember, that of my own life.

I'm building houses in Second Life. Each house is one I've lived in before, at some point in my life. I've got a timeline, and the houses are nothing new - I've worked with this subject for quite some time now, in various mediums and manners. But this time, there's more to it. In addition to video and text, there can be character development - like a movie, but not.

It's rather quick, too, comparatively. I mean, in Second Life, I can build a house in a day in pretty short order. Whereas in First Life, it definitely takes longer than that (we've been building a garage for more than a month now and it's still plywood!) Whereas in SL, it really is a matter of a (4 hour) day. As you can see by the moon in the top picture and the sunrise in this last image.

So, it's 10:21 here in Denver. The sun is rising in Second Life, and it's time for bed for me since I have a day job to do. If only I had the capability of actually doing my Second Life while simultaneously managing my first life as well.

The burden of Digital

2007-08-16T10:31:00.000-06:00

Just a small self serving post here - because I am doing a lot of stuff digitally, I need to now carry a bazillion extra things around....rather than just a camera and film tucked into my bag for trips, I need to take my laptop, cables, power cables, camera, battery charger and for this next trip I also need the additional extras of power converters for European plugs.

And I admit it. I'm vain. ;) I don't want something that looks huge and bulky, or loud and obnoxious.

Anyone out there with a suggestion for a carry-on that would keep all this organized and *look good* at the same time?

G-d as Programmer

2007-08-15T13:23:00.000-06:00

Interesting NYT article on the idea of the 'creator of the world' as a programmer sitting in his mother's basement.

And a response on Terra Nova...

Wasting Time

2007-08-14T10:54:00.000-06:00

Amy Ross just wrote about the time waster that is the IM function on google talk, and embedded into gmail.

I'll admit it, I am highly HIGHLY skilled at procrastination. I don't even NEED someone on the other end of the IM to help me waste time. I text with my cell phone, I surf blogs while I am supposed to be 'researching' things, I play the 'wishlist game' on amazon (find a book you want, add it to your wishlist, then based on that selection, amazon will offer you another set of books, pick one, go from there, on and on and on - no wonder my wish list is 10 pages long), and I compose tons and tons of blog entries that never get posted.

Never mind the dilemma of "Oooh, hardcore theory reading or the new Blueprint magazine? Which one do I pick?" (of course, I did allow the Blueprint subscription to lapse as an attempt to be good, but there's still the temptation of design blogs all over the place that lure me away from the studio. Then again, there's work to do instead of the studio too - work that is good work, not my day job (g-d no) but things like assembling a book for a client of images from their wedding, or editing head shots for another client who is being interviewed by a german magazine about political blogging, or cleaning up documentation I've done for another artist/client of their work for their website/slides/etc.

The studio is a strange beast though.....a room that echoes and pulls.....luring you in for work....calling you back.....

Right now I'm having trouble with the studio - I want to be there ALL. THE. TIME. but I can't. And then I get mad because the studio is sitting there, collecting dust. My space needs some work too....it's dark purple (a fit of frustration led me to paint the walls last fall) and not conducive to good work, so I end up piling prints on the worktable and walking out...I don't even have a door to slam, because I took the door off the entrance, and knocked down the other wall for airflow. I need better lighting in there, and better wall color, and better furniture......but what I really need is to spend 8 hours a day sitting in the studio.

I'll spend some time in there this weekend, gessoing canvases, filing prints, and putting up sketches of some of the digital pieces I'm building. I still work *in* the studio, even when I'm working digitally, and I still work on paper, in preparation for the digital work. Hopefully getting in there and getting paint and paper on the walls will make it a little more conducive to working and I can get over this hump I've been experiencing.

A New Master - Patti Hallock

2007-08-10T09:12:00.000-06:00

The Master's Thesis is a strange animal. I've been watching my friends complete their projects over the last few years, but I am nowhere near as proud as I am today. One of my closest friends is done!!

Sure, she still has to show her work in the thesis exhibition in September (which *everyone* should go to, if you are able to at all) but the hard part - critiques, discussion, classes, papers, writing a thesis, defending the thesis - all that hard work is behind her. Now she can get back to the artwork.

Patti and I met in 2002 at an event I organized in Denver, the "Arts Alliance Meet and Greet". It was a way for the art students at University of Colorado to get together, put their work on the wall, and get to know each other's styles while mingling, talking to professors, and having some wine and cheese. The event had been cancelled once already, due to a blizzard (that's Colorado for you). Patti wasn't yet a CU student at the time, but had come down to the opening with another friend of hers to check out the people and the program.

We met again in the fall of 2002 while in Joann Brennan's digital imaging class. During the first project we worked on together, Patti and I had to create digital negatives, then make contact prints in the darkroom. After alternately taking turns directing the process (ha!) Patti turned to me and said "You're kind of a control freak, aren't you?" From then on, we've been friends.

We've roomed together at SPE conferences, I had a dream about her getting into grad school (before she even applied) and our dogs and husbands are friends. I remember the first pictures Patti took from the Nocturnal Suburbia series, with her contact sheets up on the wall from 35mm negatives. I remember her first show at + Gallery, before it was + Gallery. We were both in a show (along with some of our professors) at a museum in Colorado Springs, 2004. I helped her drive to New York when she moved out there for grad school on a full time basis. And now, 2 days ago, Patti defended her thesis. She's a master!!!

Congratulations girl! You deserve all of it!!!

Administrative Type Entry

2007-08-03T08:57:00.000-06:00

In the form of follow-ups on previous posts, a "blog list" so popular, a shout out to some people, and so on.....

1st, an interview with artist Cao Fei/China Tracy (who I mentioned here) by Paddy Johnson of Art Fag City is available on the iCommons blog.

2. A list of blogs that I read that I recommend you to read. Of course, there is something of the nature of a personality contest in saying "here are my friends, all the cool kids are here" but at the same time, I only get 6-8 direct hits a day, so I'm hardly a prom queen! Anyway, some great artists, writers, etc can be found here in no particular order:

Alec Soth's Blog
AMP - Art, Music, Photography
Amy Stein
Amy Elkins
Art Fag City
Conscientious
David Byrne (yes, THAT David Byrne)
Greg Wasserstrom
Greg Allen
Jen Bekman (this is the gallery blog)
And then there is Jen's personal blog Personism
Liz Kuball
Mary Virginia Swanson (Seriously, if you have ANY intention of being serious about marketing your work, Swanee is THE person to know.)
Meet Me in Ataxia
Modern Art Notes
Notes on Politics, Theory and Photography
Brian Ulrich
PaintersNYC
Shane Lavalette
ShenPhoto
Christian Patterson
The Online Photographer
View from Baxter
Nature Morph (Amy Ross)
White Wall Collective - Detroit Art/Photo blog
Patti Hallock - She doesn't update often, but she's finishing her MFA, so can you blame her?
303Photo - This one is brand new, and I'll admit - I run it. :) It's for a special event in March of 2008 in Denver, where we are doing a Month of Photography festival. It will fill out with info soon, once galleries start getting me their info.

So is there an awesome photo blog on your list that isn't on mine? Leave it in the comments! Think I should be reading your blog? Tell me! :)

A few shout outs as well! Amy Ross's blog is the newest one on my list, and I owe her a return email, but here's the cool thing: we have a friend in common, and when I found that out, I was ecstatic! I have always loved Amy's work since I first saw it on Jen Bekman's site, and *wish* I could have seen the work in person. Make sure you take some time to look at her work, it's really brilliant.

Ahhhh! Busy!

2007-07-30T08:53:00.000-06:00

Super busy week on tap, so here, listen to this great story by WNYC's Radio Lab on Memory:

Memory and Forgetting
Show #304
Friday, June 08, 2007
According to the latest research, remembering is an unstable and profoundly unreliable process. It’s easy come, easy go as we learn how true memories can be obliterated and false ones added. And Oliver Sacks joins us to tell the story of an amnesiac whose love for his wife and music transcend his 7 second memory.

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I tried watching Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind this weekend, but ended up only making it through the first 1/3 of it.

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Anyway, I hope to respond more to these ideas here, I've got some ideas and responses I'm working with regarding the way this all relates to my work. Also, I had the chance to chat briefly with Hyperformalist Artist DC Spensley regarding some of his work created in Second Life. He is yet another artist who is moving beyond merely augmenting real life studio practice and making work that is reliant on the medium of the SL platform.

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I worked on building one of my 'tiny houses' this weekend in Second Life, and creating it on scale - rather than the excessively large spaces created by most users in SL. Even though my avatar is normal sized (same height/weight as I am in RL) the scaled house was impossible to navigate. This is yet another aspect that has to be thoroughly thought out in this project is the relationship between memory and scale, and the user interface.

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Anyway......back to work. Listen to that story, there's a great bit by one of my favorite writers, Andrei Codrescu.

Lori Nix Studio Visit

2007-07-27T15:39:00.000-06:00

Via Gallery Hopper, from Cool Hunting....

A Visit to Lori Nix's Studio

That was a video link for all of 3 seconds. Now it's a direct link, so here's a picture of her work:

Lori Nix, Natural History, 2005 from her series "The City"

I like Lori Nix's work, just because there is a similar element of construction in the idea - while not necessarily in the end result. You can see her website here.

Poetry

2007-07-27T10:26:00.001-06:00

I'm working on another entry about the idea of narcissism and memory, narcissism and the idea of the artist, but before I get to that, I wanted to throw this post up, as a response to Alec Soth's frequent Friday Poetry posts. I wonder what it is that makes photographers/artists also interested in poetry...I know I have been guilty of producing much terrible terrible maudlin teenage verse, even subjecting the local coffee house to readings of my pain on the stage, coffee on the table next to me, clove cigarette in hand...

For a long time I was sure I wanted to be a writer...I wrote fiction, I wrote poems, I even won prizes for them, and got a plaque for my 'Innovative Fiction' - a multi-layered fantasy set within the confines of a student/teacher writing critique. What made it trite was the subject matter, what made it innovative was the actual time structure in the story. There is no way in hell I would recreate it here for you to read - 1998 was a LONG time ago, and that writing can stay wrapped up in the slender volume within which it was published.

Not only did I write poems, I read them. Like every good artsy female with a tendency for being a loner, I wrote both a high school honors paper and my first college English term paper on Emily Dickinson. I still have stacks of Dickinson books in my collection at home.

Because I could not stop for death
he kindly stopped for me

Yeats, Browning, Keats, a typical romantic high schooler began my collection of poetry....but then it shifted....Rilke became my passion.

But we, while wholly concentrating on one thing,
already feel the pressure of another.
Hatred is our first response. And lovers,
are they not forever invading one another's
boundaries?

My husband I included Rilke and Cummings in our wedding ceremony.

it is at moments after i have dreamed
of the rare entertainment of your eyes,

And so on...the work of Anne Carson, Sylvia Plath, Sharon Olds, and so on.....and on....

But always, my favorite poem, the one I can recite by heart, and the poet who slices my soul open with every line, the poet who makes me never want to write another word....

Count up the almonds - Paul Celan

Count up the almonds,
count what was bitter and kept you waking,
count me in too:
I sought your eye when you looked out and no one saw you,
I spun that secret thread
where the dew you mused on
slid down to pitchers
tended by a word that reached no one's heart.

There you first fully entered the name that is yours,
you stepped toward yourself on steady feet,
the hammers swung free in the belfry of your silence,
things overheard thrust through to you,
what's dead put its arm around you too,
and the three of you walked through the evening.

Render me bitter.
Number me among the almonds.

Petition

2007-07-26T15:37:00.000-06:00

I haven't said much about the crazy proposed legislation in NYC about the rules for photography and film, it's been covered adequately elsewhere, however, if you haven't seen it yet, there is now a petition to be signed.

Go sign petition HERE.

I signed it right after Steve McCurry of Magnum, and just a few after Elinor Carucci.

Kewl.

Announcement for those in Seattle

2007-07-25T10:29:00.000-06:00

Exhibitions

Up & Now, 12 th Annual Photographic Competition Exhibition , July 13-August 30
Jurror: Charlotte Cotton, Curator of Photography, LACMA
Reception: Friday, July 13, 6:00–9:00 pm

Lectures & Events

Lecture with Charlotte Cotton, Curator of Photography, LACMA
The Photograph as Contemporary Art
Friday: August 3, 7:00 pm

Tickets: $8 General, $5 PCNW & SAM members and students
Location: Seattle Art Museum , Downtown, 1300 1st Avenue , Seattle , WA 98101
Purchase lecture tickets at PCNW, by calling (206) 720-7222, or online at Brown Paper Tickets.

This lecture concerns photographic practice over the past decade and the notion of photography as an accepted and fashionable form of contemporary art. The lecture qualifies the versions of contemporary art photography that have made a lasting impact on the discourses of art as well as highlighting the issues they raise for our perceptions of photographic practice today.

I met Charlotte Cotton last year in New York. She is absolutely brilliant, and like a total fangirl I asked her to sign my copy of The Photograph as Contemporary Art. It's a great book that introduces the conceptual framework of contemporary art over the current photographic practices of the last 25 years. It's also full of color photographs, well written and small enough to carry on the subway or the plane for some good reading time.

Charlotte critiqued my work in my studio at Bard, and she was one of my better meetings. She's incredibly insightful, and encouraged me to look at some artists I'd never seen before, especially Douglas Gordon, Elisa Sighicelli, Martina Mullaney, and Sian Bonnell. I fell in love with Douglas Gordon's work almost immediately (his installation at the MoMA last summer was un-f*cking-believable) and the other three have also intrigued me...I would love to do another post about the artists who have sent me looking at other artists....but first - I should really do some work!

Anyway, if you're in Seattle, or able to go to Seattle, go listen to Charlotte talk. She's brilliant.

An art/food metaphor laden post...

2007-07-25T08:55:00.000-06:00

Taking a step away from the Second Life side of my work, I wanted to talk about an idea that I've discussed with another artist on multiple occasions.

Raylene Campbell is a friend of mine from Montreal, we both did time (ha!) at Bard College, which is where we met. Recently, we tossed a few emails back and forth looking at some of my work I had put together. Raylene's common thread with regard to my work is the same as always - she feels it's necessary for me to get a little dirtier in the work, more emotional.

I can see where she's coming from, definitely. Her work is very visceral and raw. Her compositions of spoken word, sound and gesture have moved people to tears of anguish and tremors of rage. I even performed in one of her presentations (her thesis performance) as a screaming, sighing, cooing being in a circle of people. It's powerful stuff.

Yet in my own work, I have deep deep reservations about being too emotional. I'm a very analytical person - committed to the idea that not knowing something is no excuse, there is always knowledge out there to be acquired, and I have full faith and stock in the completely intellectual side of life. This heavily intellectual bent informs my work, and god knows it informs my personal life, much to the annoyance of my husband (especially when we're in disagreement on some issue or another - try "that's not a logical response" as a counterargument to someone's feelings, see how far that gets you!).

At the same time, my work is filled with quiet emotion - or at least I like to think it is. I approach the work with the idea that it's more of a simmering pot of stew - there is a lot in there, vegetables, stock, the bouquet garni, and the precious meat that makes the stew hearty and filling on a winter day. I don't want explosive fireworks. I try to make work that can be appreciated on the surface without hard work - as if you're hungry and just need something. There's the stew, and any decent stew will do. But at the same time, the foodies (academics? analytical sorts? thinkers?) in the audience who stick with it, taste the varying notes of sage and thyme, that hint of something, is it cocoa*? that round out the stew can start to sense that there is more to the work. It is this group of people that I am really targeting with my ideas.

But is it working? Do I need to be more guttural in the utterances I make on paper and screen? Do I need to be raw and emotional?

My more recent projects have a bit more of the exposed emotion, I think - there are the Things I've Lost project (which I absolutely love, almost a bit too much!) and the Family Snapshots series (which I am actually revisiting right now, with some additional editing and rewriting of the text for a Call For Entries due next month for Altered Aesthetics). But even pieces like Wait and Want have a surface of 'I get it' that works almost immediately - though the more time you spend with them, the more there is for you to get.

I don't know if this is all because I am working under the influence of the deadpan style of photography that is so prevalent, or is it all a result of my (throw in a cliche here) stiff upper lip mid-western upbringing? This cold sense of practicality that says to get it done, and don't ruffle any feathers? Be happy for what you have, don't get too emotional....etc.

I don't know, really. I don't know how much emotion I want to put into the work. There are artists and works I that use a deep sense of emotional impact - without being raw or blatant, but there are also the ones who have repeatedly ripped away the scabs and picked at their scars in front of the entire world. I don't want to imitate one or the other, and I don't think it's an either/or proposition. But still, it's something I struggle with - how to maintain my control and composure in the work, and at the same time, give the 'foodies' something to really sink their teeth into? And how to really make work that is *mine* - all mine, work that no matter what I do screams my name?

Everyone who has seen a Gregory Crewdson print knows when they've seen another, and another, and a third. You know that big lightbox on the wall is a Jeff Wall. With a Sophie Calle piece, they all look different, but you know what to expect of the work, a journey or discovery, and raw emotion. Then of course, you have the work if Fellini - whatever it is, it's a Fellini.

I know that in my work I can see thread of commonality throughout the work, but at the same time, I don't know if anyone else does. This struggle, always, to make work, and to imagine what the audience is seeing, is the hardest part for me. I don't want to stop at the level of "oooh, lookie what I made, it's cooooooool" - it needs to be elevated for me. I need to make something that responds to what is already out there, I need to measure and calculate and integrate the years and years of art history and experience already passing me by while I sit in my studio, or stand in a stifling room filming. If I was making art purely for myself, purely for the pleasure of making, then all would be well. But no, I am making it for others. There is a sense of ego here, I will freely admit, that I want and need you to see what I have done - that's what art is. It's a huge ego trip. In my critique group, we have mentioned that artists (as an idea) are the most tortured individuals because we have such big egos, but they're like balloons that can pop with the tiniest pin prick of a dismissal or mislaid word about our work.

It is this ego that drives me completely MAD when I have to go to a 'real' job every day, rather than stay in my studio and work on the things I need to get done. It's this ego that means my husband does the dishes and cleans up the house when I get home and immediately open up the laptop and start fiddling around in Photoshop, dismissing the idea of cleaning up or feeding the dog as not quite important until I get this one little idea worked out. But I don't want the work to BE that ego. I don't want to show the world how much I need to make the work. I want the pieces on the wall, on the screen, in the earth to all resonate with something specific - but NOT my ego, not my need to make the work.

So, that's where I am at. Wondering how much emotion is necessary for work, how much heart goes into it, vs the heart that goes into needing to actually MAKE the work. How raw is too raw? I started grad school with the phrase "I don't want art as therapy" - but how to make it emotional without making it therapeutic?

I don't have answers for these questions, but the questions are always there. Of course, I'd love to know your take on the idea, how it relates to your work, and so on. Post below or email me!

----

And as a PS to two other readers - You sent me links and I will get to them to review, I promise! I don't want to make excuses but I have been *insanely* busy. I will try to get to them this weekend though, because after next week, I don't see any breaks on my schedule till Labor Day, and then that will only be a brief respite until my trip to Europe in October. Ack!

*yes, cocoa - it's mixing recipes, but I use dutch process cocoa powder in my vegetarian chili and have convinced MANY meat eaters they're getting full servings of dead animals. Try it!

The previously mentioned SL Photographs

2007-07-19T17:59:00.000-06:00

The view inside my gallery, with my prints on the wall. For an idea of scale, I think each brick is 6" tall?

And how it looks from outside. That's me in my new 1950's look. :)

A Meta Moment.....

2007-07-19T11:21:00.001-06:00

The most common searches that bring people to my blog are:

Bernd Becher's obituary

Varying combinations of the terms suspicion, Nietzsche, Freud, Ricoeur, Marx

Windows and Mirrors

Remember - all things included here are my opinions, not quite hard fast facts. If you're reading Ricoeur for school, you probably know better than to quote me as a source, or to use my ideas outright, correct?

Thought so, but figured a little warning about copyright of intellectual property never hurts anyone.

Changing Sight....

2007-07-19T08:44:00.001-06:00

I was working on my Second Life project last night, and even have photographs to go with this post - on my laptop. And my laptop is at home. But I didn't want to not post again, so here is the text I've worked out, and you can see the images later.

Part of what makes Second Life interesting to me is the sense that it operates less like a game (World of Warcraft, for example) and more like a social space. There are art galleries, a stock market, dance clubs, a synagogue (shown to the left, photo from USA Today), shopping malls, and yes, a myriad of places for (and people interested in) virtual sex. Because of the way this seems to replicate much of a real life experience, I chose this platform to experiment with my artwork, because first and foremost, I am a Real Life artist. Second Life as a tool offers me new opportunities to think about my work, and new audiences with whom I can interact. It also offers the opportunity to 'go farther" than Real Life can manage...for various experiences. For example, again, with the Sex Clubs - a lot of people choose to limit their experience to playing out their kinks in a private, virtual fantasy world - but others work within the world as dancers, escorts, models and more, to both be the fantasy, and to profit from it. Some people use it as an escape.

What I am doing is using it as the hyperreal - and while I'm not completely fluent in this language yet, what I mean is this: I am myself in real life, I am myself plus more in Second Life. I am not trying to replicate the original, but instead create an extension of the original. For example - in Real Life, I am 5'6" and about 130 pounds. In Second Life, it's possible to measure your avatar for size and shape - and I've made mine to be the same size and shape as my real self - including the shape of my face, my nose, my chin, etc. But - my feet are smaller in SL, my hair is better....and I usually wear a bit more makeup. In real life, I was raised in a mixed religious setting - in SL I am extremely active and committed to the Jewish community. And as far as art goes, in Real Life my studio is a 9x10 room in my house with shelves crammed full of cameras, books, film, paper, paint, glue, negatives, proof sheets, sketch books, notes to myself...and in SL, my studio is a beautiful glass, steel and brick 2 story building with plenty of natural light, hardwood floors, exhibition space and a deck with a view of the sunrise (which happens every 4 hours in SL).

That's quite an introduction for what is essentially my idea here. Currently in my SL gallery, I have a set of 5 images up on the walls, a couple of which are pictured here. These are a from an idea I've been working with for the last few months - a small model of every house I've ever lived in, built from memory - with the pieces I don't recall left out of the model. The models were then put into the garden and photographed with a pinhole camera, as a way of changing the view of them - taking them from a straight documentary shot to more of an environment image - perspectives are distorted, light and color are enhanced, and the object/model becomes a representation of the uncanny - it's a house, but it's not....and the image is warm and welcoming, but it's not.

The idea of showing these works in the SL gallery was just to get my building skills up to speed and to generate traffic in the gallery. Already I've had 2 walk in visitors while I was there working, and I have yet to install a visitor tracker (though it is possible to do so) for when I'm not there. So, the images are there, in standard wood frames with white mats, installed in a standard fashion you'd see in real life - only they are huge. Everything in Second Life is huge - so exhibiting work at my gallery, I chose to make the pieces big - they're about 3x5 feet, as opposed to a smaller, standard print size.

But showing them in the standard style doesn't change the way we see work, or experience it. And that's the part of Second Life that I'm interested in, with regards to my work - how is using this as a platform any different than any other way of exhibiting work - whether in a gallery, on the web, by blogging, or wheatpasting posters up?

The only way it makes sense to use something like Second Life is to use it for experiences BEYOND the normal reality of Real Life. Which brings me to the Real Life representations of Second Life - the work of James Deavin and Cao Fei, respectively.

I've mentioned James Deavin before in this blog. He had a show of landscape photographs from Second Life at the jen bekman gallery last year, one of which is shown here (James Deavin - Bliss Falls - From the Jen Bekman Gallery website). The thing about these images is that they show a fascination with "wow, look at this synthetic world, it is amazing, and we can take photographs in it too." Not much is actually *surprising* in the images, other than their glossy, overly synthetic appearance, but Deavin does acknowledge that the world, and those in it, are using it for far less than the true potential it holds. Additionally, Deavin's work is about the visuality of the 'world' which is mediated through vision - the way to look around your space you are in is through 'camera controls' - so the photographic nature of this work does address the apparatus of vision and sight as the main arbiter of the SL experience.

The White Cube installation by Juria Yoshikawa I mentioned before uses the potential of Second Life to create kinetic installations, and not use gravity - a nice feature of a virtual world. In the linked images, you can see various avatars floating up and down within the space, which was constructed of light and sound. There has also been a movie created in Second Life by Real Life artist from China, Cao Fei (SL name China Tracy) playing with regularity on You Tube in three parts: 1, 2, 3.

So what does this mean for my work?

I'm still thinking on all of that. I don't intend for the current gallery space I built to be the be-all/end all of the work - more like a headquarters. I am starting work on building out full detail versions of my model houses in SL, which is really great because you can pick it up and put it in your pocket when you're done - just like cleaning up your studio. I figured out some basic scripting techniques with help from friends (a bonus to the site - others working with the same materials with different goals can share techniques and information) so that I can actually give people information about the work. I can set up a series of linked locations to take people back to various sites so the gallery doesn't need to be a single location in order to convey the message about the work.

But what about the people who would experience the work itself? Second Life requires you download the software to your computer. It takes a while to learn the intricacies of navigation, communication and even sight. It requires logging in with an ID and Password.

Much of my other work has required some kind of effort on the part of the viewer. I am still thinking about this aspect - my video work requires the viewer to wait and be quiet to completely observe what is going on in the scene, or tweaks the audio sensitivity of the audience (I've freaked more than a couple people out with the Pick video, just because the audio bothers them, or they don't like the implied sensation of the paint under their nails.) Some of the work I *haven't* done, but sketches and plans have been drawn up for, also requires effort on the part of the viewer, usually physical effort to actually interact with the piece, such as entering a space. So by creating these additional barriers to observation and interaction - what does that say about the line in the sand for technology in art?

This is a wholly unsatisfactory place to end this post, but it's the beginning of a long project, so I don't have answers, unfortunately (and I'm at work, Shhhh!!!). So, I'll still be thinking about this, and if you think you have comments to add, please do.

Just a short flight.....

2007-07-13T11:33:00.001-06:00

As reported on Terra Nova

I should take a short trip to Singapore.....not really. It's a 24 hour flight, costs about $100 an hour, too.

But wouldn't it be cool to attend the State of Play Conference? I'm specifically interested in this presentation:

11:00 a.m. – 12:30 p.m. Space, Place and Culture Inside Virtual Worlds

The panel will discuss issues related to the relationship between space and place, and how or if these relationships translate from physical to virtual worlds. The discussion is intended to cover issues ranging from how we can recreate a sense of place within virtual environments, to how this sense of place impacts people’s different engagements with one another and affect their conduct and activities in particular spaces and territories.

But that one presentation isn't worth flying all the way to Singapore, especially when I'm down to almost no vacation, other than what's in reserve for Europe in the fall......

Wonder if they'll simulcast any presentations in a virtual world?